


Little Red Riding Crop

by hippos



Category: X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014) - Fandom, X-Men: First Class (2011) - Fandom
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, BDSM, Dad!Erik, Dirty Talk, Flogging, Light BDSM, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Nanny!Charles, Rough Sex, Sexual Tension, Spanking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-08
Updated: 2015-05-20
Packaged: 2018-03-21 21:40:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 34,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3705545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hippos/pseuds/hippos
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erik Lehnsherr had a painful divorce which had cost him his precious son. He had lost custody because of his dark secrets from the past, and now finally with his son by his side, he lives a normal life in order not to loose him again. But what happens when the new live-in nanny - young and vibrant Charles Xavier, who loves kids more than anything in the world, and follows orders like no one else, comes into his life and his old desires are brought back?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Charlie, why are you crying?" Lily asked.  
  
"Because I'm leaving, princess," I stated sadly, hugging her one last time. Yes, this is me - Charles Xavier, who adores kids. I'm lucky enough that it's also my way of making money. And the little girl in my arms is Lily, who I'd been taking care of for the last year and a half. But now I'm fired. Not because I'm not good at my job, I'm great at what I do. Some may be sceptical at hiring a male nanny, but I love children and they love me, a parent who sees that connection between me and their kid is a good parent. I give everything for them, I've been in this profession for a while. But it's always hard for me when I have to leave a family. Like right now, I'm crying my eyes out because I'm saying goodbye to this lovely girl, just because her father is a cheating jackass. Yes, I caught him cheating on his wife, and for him it was easier to say I was stealing stuff from them so I would get fired and not tell his wife…  
  
"Aren't you coming back tomorrow?" she asked sadly too, pouting.  
  
"No, sweetie… But I will call you, okay?"  
  
"Okay…" I petted her hair gently and kissed her head. "Bye, little princess."  
  
"Bye, Charlie. I'll miss you."  
  
And there goes the breaking of my heart. Sometimes I wonder if I'm in the right profession.  
  
I started doing this when I was pretty young. I was barely 17 - it was the only way to pay for my piano lessons and then for university. But then it became something I enjoyed, even more than playing the piano, so a couple of years later I started tutoring kids or taking care of them and I'm happy with what has become of me.  
  
It turned out I couldn't leave all those children whose parents didn't have time for them. They need me.  
  
And now I need a job.

  
***

  
I went to the agency and literally begged Raven to find me something; she was my agent and right now a savior. It would be hard now that my file said I was a stealing piece of crap, but I got some great recommendations too.  
  
"I'm sorry, Charles-"  
  
"Please, I will do anything. Absolutely anything! Even if there's a whole kindergarten or a zoo, you know I can handle anything and everyone."  
  
"Hmm… well, I suppose there's something…"  
  
"Great!" Oh thank god, with that last job, I'd be lucky to get whatever it is.  
  
"Don't get too excited. The boy you'll have to take care of is…. pretty difficult."  
  
I smiled at her. "There is no such thing as a difficult child, Raven. Only parents who are not understanding enough."  
  
"There's our saint, Charles." It's true. Leslie - another girl I'd been looking after for a year - had the habit of chewing on her hair when she was nervous. Six months with me and I managed to make her stop doing it. "And then there's the father…" She paused dramatically. But didn't she hear what I said? I'd do anything!  
  
"Just spit it out, Raven. What is he? A demon, a vampire, what? Whatever he is I'm still doing it."  
  
"He's pretty strict… And he doesn't have a lot of patience with nannies who can't handle his son." She blushed. "And he looks like a god."  
  
"What?" I snorted with laughter.  
  
"It's true. I've seen his picture. I had two nannies fired at his place because they were throwing themselves at him. He's gorgeous. His name is Erik Lehnsherr. Have you heard of him?"  
  
"Not quite the circles we move in I'm pretty sure." I chuckled. I'm sure he's some filthy rich arrogant jerk who is twice my age. And the fact that she's asking if I've heard of him tells me I'm right, and he must be a pretty big deal to people who are interested in those kind of celebrities.  
  
"Well, I know how good you are, Charles, but this… I have sent over fifteen nannies there and no one stayed more than a week so far."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes. And it hasn't been happening only with the young girls. I have sent some really mature ladies there too and they've packed their bags within a few days as well. One of them quit within hours!"  
  
"What could possibly be so wrong with this job?" I really started wondering but it wasn't going to scare me.  
  
"I told you, the boy is really difficult."  
  
"And I told you, there are no difficult children. Only difficult parents. Mr. Lehnsherr must be very difficult…"  
  
"I don't know. I hope I'm not making a mistake sending you there."  
  
"Where is that?"  
  
"That's the next problem… It's in Yorkshire…"  
  
"Oh jesus. I'm in London." She laughed, because stating the obvious was one of my many talents. "Yorkshire is more than 2 hundred miles away! How am I supposed to get there every day on time?"  
  
"You'll have to be a live-in nanny. You'd get all expenses and accommodation. And the pay is good. Twice as much than our usual placements."  
  
"And what about the mother?"  
  
"He's divorced. Joint custody. So you'll be coming back here when the kid's with her."  
  
"Then I'm going, there's not much to think about." I didn't have a choice. It must be a horrible job if so many quit, but I'm not a quitter and I surely don’t get scared easily.

  
***

  
Well, that's it. I'm lost. I'm so rubbish with directions and the rainy, misty weather in Yorkshire doesn't help at all. I'm driving my poor old car on something I don't even know if I could call a road.  
  
What the hell is this? Am I in Silent Hill? I don't even have a phone signal here. Great.  
  
There are lots of trees around me and I drive slowly, because I can't see shit. Alright, maybe I'm a little scared now. I decided to leave earlier in order to not arrive late, but it's 4 in the morning and there's no living soul around here.  
  
I whirled around looking for a house or a box or just something! There's nothing but trees and fog before me.  
  
I used to love Beauty and the Beast when I was little, and this just reminds me too much of it. I'm looking for the castle, hidden in the woods.  
  
The question is - is there really a beast inside? Is Erik Lehnsherr the one scaring all the nannies away?  
  
And then lost in thoughts, I hit something.  
  
Not something, but a gate. A big fucking metal monster of a gate with two massive stone pillars at least eight feet tall. Holy crap, how did I not see this? It could probably be seen from space.  
  
I tried to start my car again but, just my luck, I couldn't move from the gate. Great first impression, Charles. You could have parked the car inside the house also! What was I thinking? I should have kept my eyes to the front.  
  
The gate started opening, awkwardly bent a little by my poor car which looked worse than the gate itself.  
  
I stepped out in the rain and I still couldn't see a thing. But I could hear a furious voice coming from the house.  
  
"What the hell was that?"  
  
And finally I was able to see. A tall, broad shouldered man storming and spitting with fury coming my way.  
  
I wrapped my arms around me, shivering and soaking from the rain.  
  
I narrowed my eyes so I could see better through the rain. His hair and T-shirt quickly drenched in the downpour, making him look like he's just come from a magazine. There is no other way to describe him. The white T-shirt clung to his body, revealing his muscular chest. He is beautiful and I just stand there dripping wet, gaping at him.  
  
He got closer and if I thought he was beautiful from a distance, no amount of exposure could have prepared me for him up-close. His eyes are framed in thick, wet-from-the-rain black lashes. He's masculine and gorgeous.  
  
Blood rushed into my cheeks as I stared at his penetrating blue eyes. Or are they grey? _Stop it you dork, this isn't a romantic movie._  
  
I'm stunned into speechlessness, which doesn't happen very often to me. I physically can't turn my gaze from him.  
  
I saw his expression soften once he got close enough to see me. It was probably because I was trembling. He stared at me, unabashedly, his expression curiously blank, and now standing too close to me than two people who just met should.  
  
"I-I am C-Charles Xav-vier. I'm s-so sorry." My teeth were clattering from the cold and he was inspecting me from head to toes in the fucking rain. With him towering over me I felt even more intimidated, which made me wait breathlessly for him to do or say something.  
  
He gave me a lupine smile and it looked… sinful. He's the ultimate tall, dark, and handsome type. When I say dark, I don't mean his coloring, but the places your mind goes when you look at him…  
  
"Come inside, Charles Xavier." I was wrong. This right here was no beast…  
  
This is a wolf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heyyy, my dears!!!  
> We said goodbye to our modern Beauty and the Beast and now you can meet the modern Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf ;P  
> I have my lovely beta [lapetiteyoyo](http://archiveofourown.org/users/lapetiteyoyo) by my side <3  
> Just tell me what you think. I hope you'll enjoy it :))  
> Lots of love <3


	2. Chapter 2

_The wolf thought to himself:_ _"_ _What a tender young creature!_ _W_ _hat a nice plump mouthful_ _…"_

 Little Red Riding Hood

***  
[  
](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/116108658657/chapter-2)

We got inside the house, water dripping from both of us on the tile floor. It's a really erotic picture if you look at us - _no, don't look at it that way Charles. You're here to do your job. You don't need to have 'seducing a father' on your file too!_  
  
He cocked his head, eyes roaming slowly over my dripping wet body. I felt naked. I wished I was naked, with him. Okay, just so you know I'm really professional and I've never allowed that kind of thought to go through my mind with other men when I'm at work. I don't know what's happening to me right now.  
  
"So, you want to tell me why you were barricading my gate?" he asked, amused.  
  
"I am really sorry, but I was looking for Erik Lehnsherr's-"  
  
"Well you found me," he said with a pretty big smile for a person whose home I almost destroyed. There was just one little sparkle of hope inside me that he wasn't Erik Lehnsherr, but it's him. Or more like a Heathcliff or a Mr. Rochester but that's just me being fanciful. And he really looked like a god.  
  
Calling this man handsome would be like saying Einstein was fairly decent at his sums. He was so handsome I wanted to demand an apology from him.  
  
With his shirt molded to his well-defined chest, he smelled like a crisp fall day, I could see his nipples- _Jesus, Charles! This right here is your employer. Control yourself, stop with the ogling!_  
  
"I'm here to take care of your son. I'm from the agency. It's nice to meet you." I finally found my voice and extended my hand to him.  
  
His smile quickly fell. His brows furrowed. He didn't look happy. At all.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm the new nanny. I came earlier because I didn't want to be late."  
  
"Late? It's four in the morning!"  
  
"I know. I'm awfully sorry. And for your gate," I said, embarrassed.  
  
But he wasn't interested in a talk about his gate. He was much more interested in… me.  
  
"Are you even qualified?" And here it goes again. I look stupidly [young](https://31.media.tumblr.com/d631ca066cf9467a9639855321f5e6c8/tumblr_nk59kgn1SV1rjjxbmo1_250.gif). Well, I'm not that older either. I'm 22, and when I start a new job it's a pain in the ass to convince people that I actually know what I'm doing.  
  
"I am." I quickly reached into my bag, which was soaking too, and I pulled out my file with my reference letters.  
  
"It's-" He grabbed it from my hands forcefully and started reading… but he wasn't reading my recommendation letters, what experience I had in this job, no - he was more interested in my birth certificate.  
  
"Charles - now that's a name to grow into…" I gasped at hearing him say my name. Oh Jesus! He looked up at me, his eyes raking up and down my admittedly small frame and my heart suddenly leaped with excitement. It pumped copious amounts of blood into my cheeks. I gave him a small smile, blushing, and he smiled back at me. It was devilish, arrogant and… challenging.  
  
_He's daring me._  
  
And I don't even know-  
  
"You are gay," he stated calmly, his eyes seeing right through me.  
  
"What?" I looked with an aghast expression at him. How did he immediately know? Did Raven put it in my file? What the hell?  
  
"I'm sorry, Mr. Lehnsherr, but I really am good at what I do, and my sexuality doesn't have anything to do with the children-"  
  
"I didn't say anything about your skills, I was just… chatting."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"You need dry clothes. You are shivering." I am shivering, from the cold but probably not entirely…  
  
"Yes." So I am staying after all. I don't really know what's happening but okay. He disappeared for a moment, leaving me all alone in the huge hall, this was one big house, more like a castle… and then he returned with a towel and handed it to [me](http://38.media.tumblr.com/4c948ad1d101515117ba8fee20227fca/tumblr_nl9y47YBZV1rjjxbmo1_250.gif).  
  
"I'll go get your stuff from your car, you stay here." It was a commanding voice. A voice that's used to being in charge. A voice that made me say 'Yes, okay.' without even thinking. He has a slight German accent, but he also sounds English.  
  
Before going out in the rain, he flashed me one more cheeky smile, because I was staring again - he had a scar right above his lips and on his chin too. I wondered where he got these from. But it made him look wild and tough.

  
***

  
I took as many deep breaths as possible before he returned but it wasn't enough, I was still not prepared for his hot, fit and wet body before me- oh no, he was saying something.  
  
"Mm?" I mumbled an incoherent sound.  
  
"I said follow me. You're not very good at listening, huh?" He smirked and I reddened, hurrying to follow him.  
  
"This will be your room if you decide to stay." I looked around in awe, this room was bigger than my apartment in London. "I'll have someone fix your car tomorrow. You have your own bathroom, take a shower and get warm, I can't have you getting sick on me, can I?" It sounded like an order again, even though there was a light smile on his lips. "I'll be expecting you for breakfast at 8."  
  
"Thank you, Mr. Lehnsherr," I mumbled, smiling back at him. "And I won't be leaving. I don't leave when things get tough." He smiled with an unreadable look in his eyes. "Good to know."  
  
He closed the door behind him and I exhaled a breath of relief. Whoa. That's one intense man. I didn't know if I should take a hot or a cold shower.

  
***

  
I woke up in a comfortable, big bed, and while I was opening my eyes I realized I'm not at home. Oh god, I'm in the castle of Mr. Rochester.  
  
I brushed my teeth, took a quick shower, I tried to do something about my messy hair but then I realized I had spent too much time in front of the mirror. I wore my warmest sweater, I put on my 'I'm a great nanny' smile and went downstairs.  
  
And… holy crap! Is this the reaction I'd always get when I see him? This is not good.  
  
He was wearing a suit, ready to leave for work. Good god - yesterday I thought he was hot and sexy with his damp T-shirt all over his chest, but today… Jesus. I've always stood behind the saying that clothes make the man. In this case, the man makes the clothes.  
  
He's dressed in a dark grey suit. It's not anything special, but he effortlessly turns that plain suit and white shirt into something more. Something dashing and debonair. Something dangerous… Very, very dangerous.  
  
It had me biting my lower lip. Damn it, he noticed me.  
  
A slow smirk crept on his lips.  
  
"Join me for breakfast so we could discuss your work here," he commanded and disappeared into what I assume was the kitchen.  
  
"Sit." I did as he said, without a second thought, until I realized that he was about to make breakfast.  
  
"Oh, Mr. Lehnsherr let me prepare the breakfast, you're already dressed up, I don't want-"  
  
"I don't mind getting a little dirty for you." Cue my blush after that devilish smile of his. "Besides, you're here to watch after my son, you're not the cook, not a housekeeper, you shouldn't worry about this."  
  
The kitchen was huge and we were sitting at the table across from each other. There was an awkward silence for a while, at least for me it was, he seemed perfectly calm as he stared at me. It was really intimidating.  
  
"Would you like eggs?" He finally spoke.  
  
"Yes," I said quietly.  
  
"Fried or scrambled?"  
  
"Fried." He just sat there, continuing to question me about eggs like he had no intention whatsoever to actually make them.  
  
"How do you like them?"  
  
"I-I'm sorry?"  
  
"Hard or runny?" Oh Jesus. His gaze at me was fierce and I'm not thinking about eggs anymore. How did I get so horny lately? I reddened immediately. Damn my fair skin and him!  
  
"Hard, please," I murmured, finally able to look away from him and down at my hands. I shifted in my chair and I looked back at him. He raised an eyebrow and threw me a stomach-melting smile. My chest puffed up.  
  
"Good choice." A light smile was curling at the corner of his mouth. He knew exactly what effect he was having on me right now, and those sensual innuendos.  
  
He went to the fridge, then grabbed a pan and started making me my breakfast. I exhaled a quiet breath of relief that he wasn't looking at me anymore.  
  
"Do you want coffee?"  
  
"Tea, please."  
  
He came back with two cups and sat opposite me again. "Anything else?"  
  
"No, I'm fine. Thank you."  
  
"My son should be up any minute. I'll introduce you, then I'll give you a tour around the house, and I'll have to leave for work. I come back around 5 pm."  
  
"Okay. I wanted to ask about the times when, he won't be… here."  
  
"Yes, his mother and I work out when he'll be spending time with me and when he goes back to her, so you can go home then, but if you need to be somewhere, it's not a problem-"  
  
"Oh no, I don't, I was just wondering."  
  
"Okay. Tell me more about you then." It was my turn to gape at him again. This was all so strange. I'd never interacted with parents that way, and they certainly weren't interested in me.  
  
"Um, there isn't much to tell actually." I chuckled nervously. "I really love my job and children are-"  
  
"No. This is not an interview. I don't want to hear your motivation for the job. You're already hired. I want to know about you." I swallowed hard and he leaned forward on the table.  
  
"O-okay. I've lived in London all my life… I studied hard at Royal Academy of Music and graduated with good grades and…" I didn't know what he wanted to hear so I just continued telling him some basic stuff about me. "And I'm overall a good person." I smiled broadly at him, while my hands were wringing together, under the table, like I was some sort of a maniac.  
  
He tilted his head to the left.  
  
"A good boy, huh?" He was still staring at me with that intense [gaze](https://33.media.tumblr.com/c70f5af4d68aea680dca3fd281ac258f/tumblr_nilan8p34t1rjjxbmo3_250.gif).  
  
The way he said that made my cheeks burn and I know they're fiery red.  
  
"Y-yes, I guess you could say that."  
  
"Are you good at taking orders, Charles?" That's kind of an odd question.  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr, I'm here to take care of your son, but I won't allow myself to raise him how I like, I'll-"  
  
"No, no. I wasn't afraid of such thing. I mean usually - in life, are you good at taking orders?"  
  
My mind goes to work related stuff again, although I'm sensing it's not quite what he was asking me, but then again I don't know what he's asking at all.  
  
"I guess I am. Why? I'll do whatever you'd like me to-" I started saying without even thinking. Oh god how could I have let a sentence like that slip from my mouth?  
  
He stilled, he didn't expect this and neither did I. His expression turned serious and the scars he had gave him even a more rugged and dangerous look. He pushed his plate away and he slowly stood up when I heard little steps coming from the other room.  
  
"Daddy?" A lovely mini version of Mr. Lehnsherr appeared in the kitchen and I didn't even wait for him to introduce us.  
  
"Hello, you must be Pietro. I'm Charles." I smiled brightly feeling finally in my own waters. I extended my hand to him. Sometimes children have to be treated a little bit like adults and not have someone pinching their cheeks like crazy old ladies.  
  
"Daddy is she going to look after me now?" he asked sadly, and me and Mr. Lehnsherr both chuckled. I wish I could say it's the first time I’ve been mistaken for a girl, but it's not.  
  
"Yes, Charles will take care of you now." He went to him and picked him in his arms. It was the sweetest picture I've ever seen. He murmured something in his ear and kissed his head, putting him down.  
  
He showed me around the house, the place was huge, and he didn't have time to walk me around every room. He told me about some lady that would come to cook Pietro's lunch and mine, but that's just nonsense. I'm a great cook, why would-  
  
"Excuse me?" I must have said it out loud. And he was pretty surprised, he's not used to people talking back at him apparently.  
  
"I- I can cook, I don't see why shouldn't I do it-"  
  
"Very well then, I'll double your pay-"  
  
"No, that's not necessary Mr. Lehnsherr. I'd do it with pleasure."  
  
He looked at me and then grinned. "You're quite spirited, Charles." Every time he said my name it sent shivers through my body. "I like it." Oh my…  
  
"I'll be going out now. Don't go into the woods, especially past the stream. Understood?"  
  
"Yes, Mr. Lehnsherr. Don't worry, your son is in good hands." I smiled and looked down the boy next to me.  
  
"Alright, be a good boy." He patted little Pietro's head, but looked at me.

  
***

  
It wasn't going very well to say the least. Pietro wasn't talking to me, he refused to eat what I was trying to give him, he even threw his shoe at me when I made him a fresh squeezed orange juice. He was snapping at me if I was talking to him too much. He pushed me a couple of times out of his way, and just locked himself in his room for the longest time.  
  
But I'm patient, this is what I do, I help kids. The divorce must have been the hardest on him. This boy needs me. So no thoughts about his father should pass through my mind! 

Or maybe I'm just a masochist. Either way I'm not leaving.  
  
I walked around the house and found him in something like a study, but it was just as big as any other room and it had a beautiful black grand piano in the middle of it. The curtains were dark red, and it added to the sophisticated look of the place.  
  
Pietro was sitting on the stool but he wasn't touching the piano, he was looking outside the window.  
  
"Is this your piano?" I asked softly. He didn't say anything, he just shook his head. Mr. Lehnsherr must be the one who plays the piano then. He had to play the piano too, didn't he? No mercy at all for me…  
  
And Pietro sitting here made my heart clench, he loves his dad and he obviously misses him a lot. That's why he doesn't like his nannies. "Would you mind if I play something?" I asked but he still didn't say a single word. Kids love music. I used to walk around houses with a guitar before, but this is even more perfect.  
  
I took my seat next to him and tried a few notes. What should I play? Mr. Lehnsherr's delicious accent played in my head and I couldn't concentrate on any other note. So I thought German. Who else than the greatest of all time Germans - Beethoven. I hadn't played him in the longest time, I was much more into Ravel and other French composers lately, but now Beethoven it is.  
  
My fingers danced on the piano and I felt Pietro shift beside me. With the corner of my eyes I saw him turning to the piano too, he looked relaxed now, not bothered by my presence. When the melody was over I smiled at him and he spoke quietly.  
  
"My daddy plays that too…"  
  
"He does? Well, it's a beautiful melody, don't you think?"  
  
"Yes, I like it."  
  
"Me too."  
  
I think that's a good beginning of a friendship.

  
***

  
Mr. Lehnsherr came home and he asked me to stay with them for dinner. It was nice, we talked, Pietro looked happy that his father was here, and ignored me. Once he went to his room I was left alone with Mr. Lehnsherr, I should probably go, it's not very appropriate to sit here with him all night…  
  
"So, how was your first day here?" he asked, not giving any indication that he wanted me to leave.  
  
I smiled softly.  
  
"Your son threw his shoe at me."  
  
"Really?" he asked, but he wasn't surprised. I guess it happened to the others too.  
  
"Yes, and it almost knocked down your… wine." I pointed to where I had put the bottle in more safe place.  
  
"It's Romanee Conti from 1975. Thank you for saving it for me."  
  
"It must be really expensive. If I had something that valuable I'd lock it up," I joked, chuckling. I liked talking to him, even if every word of his towards me was said with so much intensity to it, and kept me on edge, I enjoyed it.  
  
And those long intimidating pauses he did, like right now, just [his eyes studying every line on my face](https://33.media.tumblr.com/efede0e5aa574f148cc2670f41788801/tumblr_nilan8p34t1rjjxbmo2_250.gif), made me flush.  
  
"I plan to."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, he really plans to do so ;)))  
> Have some wet [Charles ](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/116108658657/chapter-2) ;P


	3. Chapter 3

I've been here for a few days, and we have some progress. Pietro is talking to me now, at least! Yay! I play him the piano every day; I think that's what melts his heart. But today we had some problematic situations. He bit me on my arm. That's one wild kid…  
  
And Mr. Lehnsherr… oh Mr. Lehnsherr - he's so… so… terrifyingly powerful. I don't mean like he's scary or a bad boss or anything. It's just the way he carries himself. Even his shoes are intimidating! He still watches me all the time when he's home, I don't know if my desires towards him play tricks with my mind but I think he's flirting with me. It's probably just in my head. But the way he watches me, I feel naked. I didn’t quite mind his gaze on me actually. It felt intimate without being inappropriate. Well there were inappropriate thoughts in my head…

"What is that?" I was doing the dishes when Mr. Lehnsherr got home and forcefully grabbed my arm. It took me by surprise and his touch on my skin… I felt like I was being branded.

I looked up to his face; his nostrils were flaring as he was staring at the mark Pietro left me. I was having trouble breathing with him standing so close, but managed to give him some sort of answer.  
  
"I- Pietro and I got ahead of ourselves as we were playing." I chuckled nervously while he still held my arm. "It's okay, really," I assured him.  
  
"You bruise easily…" He kept staring at my bruise and then he ran his thumb over it. Oh jesus, my breathing picked up, I looked away so he wouldn't notice but I'm pretty sure I didn't succeed in hiding it. God damn him and his voodoo! I bet he chats up all the nannies and shags them, then ditches them and they leave his house heartbroken. Maybe that's why they all left.  
  
"I'm okay." I tried to pull my arm from his grip before I gasp out loud.  
  
"Your skin is very pale. I'll bring you something for this."  
  
"Thank you, Mr. Lehnsherr."

  
***

  
"What are you doing, Pietro?" I asked, stepping into his room to bring him lunch. He was playing on his XBOX killing zombies and stuff and completely ignored me.  
  
"Oh you play Resident Evil? Your dad lets you play that?"  
  
"Yeah, you know it?" He paused the game, turning to me.  
  
"Know it? I love it! Killing zombies in the most brutal ways, what's not to love?" I snorted.  
  
"Wanna play with me?" he asked shyly. Aw, he's letting me in. Now that we've got even more things in common I'm going to make the best of it.  
  
"Of course!" I sat on the ground next to him and he handed me the other controller.  
  
"You're going to be the girl."  
  
"Of course I am." I chuckled at his enthusiasm.  
  
We teamed up pretty well, and I think not only within the game.

  
***

  
I shared with Mr. Lehnsherr that night that I'm starting to get along with his son pretty well now.  
  
"You played games with him?" he asked, bewildered.  
  
"Yeah. It was so fun. Do you… not play games with him?"  
  
"No, I don't."  
  
"Oh, so what do you play then?" I asked, smiling sweetly. And he turned to me with a hint of mischief in his eyes, a little smile curving on his lips, like he just thought of a private joke, then he spoke.  
  
"Other games."  
  
"Like… board games?" I asked cluelessly again and he grinned, even a little laugh escaped his lips. I was confused at his amusement but then his laughter got contagious. So I laughed with him.  
  
"Wow, that's an awesome laugh." He complimented me out of nowhere, really sounding a bit taken with it.  
  
It took me a moment to realize I had stopped breathing.  
  
I was burning inside out. My completely melted expression brought him back to reality and he sensed it was a dangerous zone too so he turned his head away and spoke sternly.  
  
"Play for me."  
  
"W-what?" I asked, still not over his previous comment.  
  
"I want to hear you play for me. Come with me." He stood up and I followed him.

  
***

  
And so as always, whatever he wanted I provided. I've played for much bigger audiences and now I was nervously, stupidly shaking once I took my seat on the stool, with Mr. Lehnsherr's hot gaze on me at the other side of the room, waiting for me to blow his mind, or did he expect me to fail? Why did he always insist on intimidating and humiliating me? I'm starting to think he likes it… But he's not an asshole, I just… I don't know what to think with him.  
  
I finally got my shit together and the opening, evocative strains of Tchaikovsky’s ['Swan Lake'](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1WlvXneu6oY) filled the room. I didn't need to look up, or hear his sharp intake of breath as he recognized the piece, to know that Mr. Lehnsherr was stunned.   
  
I was glowing inside because I knew, at last, I have him. I have at least a little bit of the effect he has on me.  
  
Completely in my element, I surely developed the piece. I built the melody, pouring my own energy into it, louder, faster, ever more compelling. _Don't lose it, Charles_. I wanted to be perfect. _For him_.  
  
I coaxed the music towards its crashing crescendo. I was so exhilarated, so pumped up I felt like I could fly in that moment, as if I, myself would turn into swan in that moment, as if I was the vulnerable, gentle, caring, modest and warm-hearted Odette and this was my last dance. But as the final note died away I was also aware of feeling drained, as if my last dregs of energy were poured into that piece. Because I played for him. I put my everything in to impress him. And it was the performance of my life. Because of him.  
  
This lovely, sensual, atmospheric melody, and that moment was sublime and I just knew it will live with me forever.  
  
I looked up to see his face was stilled, but his beautiful blue eyes were warm, admiring, the passion of the piece not lost on him. I felt a clenching low down in my belly, glad that I have somehow affected him, touched him.  
  
There was warmth, certainly, and interest. I had his full attention.  
  
Whatever he may have been thinking, I just knew down to my stretched-out toes that I nailed it. I impressed him. I've never played better and with more emotion, than I did now. And the only reason is him. I wanted to perform for him.  
  
I wanted to _please_ him.

  
***

  
I heard some noise outside, while we were having a quiet lunch with Pietro.  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"It's probably Alex."

"Alex?" I asked, confused, heading to the window to see what was going on.  
  
"Yeah, he's our gardener."  
  
I went outside and saw a young man who smiled brightly at me once he saw me.  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Hi, I'm Charles. The new nanny." I gave him a friendly smile too. He looked pretty surprised.  
  
"Oh wow. It's nice to meet you, Charles."  
  
"Why don't you come inside for lunch?" I offered kindly, and his smile grew wider.

  
***

  
Pietro went to play in his room and I was left to chat with another human being. It's refreshing. I've been here for too long. I mean this place is so secluded, I love the tranquility of it, I didn't have that in London. Here is so quiet and calming. I take my car and go shopping for groceries with Pietro, and for the past couple of days we've had a couple of milkshakes which we won't be telling his father about, we go to the nearest park also, but I don’t get to talk to other people much.  
  
"You're a lot different than his usual staff, I don't even know how you're still here." He chuckled. "Not that you're bad, you're just chatty. And Mr. Lehnsherr likes the type that have only work on their mind."  
  
I chuckled too.  
  
"Can I ask you a question? But let it stay between us."  
  
"Of course."  
  
"You've been here a while. Do you know if Mr. Lehnsherr sleeps with the nannies?" Well it was a little bit more blunt than I planned it to be.  
  
"What?" he asked, shocked.  
  
"Is that why they all leave? Does he have one-night stands with them and leave them heartbroken?"  
  
"No. No way he's doing that, believe me. He's a pretty strict man and he's not like that. I've worked for his family since he was still together with his wife. He's a good man. But he had some misunderstandings with her. They fought a lot. I don't know what's the case but… don't tell anyone I told you that- the divorce was awful. She took his son away-"  
  
"Oh god…"  
  
"Yes, for like a whole year he wasn't able to see him. After many times in court and expensive lawyers, she finally agreed on joint custody. I don't know what he's done but it must be pretty bad if she'd take those kind of measures."  
  
I can't imagine why would she take his son away. I don't know Mr. Lehnsherr that well, but I could clearly see how much he loved him. That's why Pietro misses his father so much when he's away. Poor thing.

  
***

  
"Come on, little soldier, let's get you to bed," I said once I saw him rubbing his eyes.  
  
"But Sherry-" I stopped the movie we were watching.  
  
"No buts, we'll watch it tomorrow."  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr mouthed an amused "Cherry" in question; I could only grin at him. Once I tucked Pietro safely to bed I returned to Mr. Lehnsherr to wish him goodnight too.  
  
"Do I wanna know why my son calls you cherry? I like that nickname though." I blushed as always but I managed to answer him.  
  
"It's not 'cherry', it's 'Sherry', it's from the game we play - I play a girl named Sherry and he plays a badass soldier. He thinks it's fun and close to my name to call me that."  
  
I left him chuckling there, he looked happy that I was bonding with his son and so was I.

  
***

  
"Alright, little soldier. Are you ready?" I asked and he nodded excitedly. I flipped the pan and he laughed happily, that this time he didn't need to duck. I was making pancakes this morning for him, ignoring the whole food list Mr. Lehnsherr has left me. Who by the way just stepped into the kitchen staring in open-mouthed disbelief at me spatula-wielding and Pietro sitting on the counter clapping his hands.  
  
"Good morning!" I beamed at him as I poured more mixture into the pan. He was still looking at me with a complete surprise on his face. And the chaos in the kitchen. It looked as though every pot and pan was in use. The dark granite countertops were dusted with flour, as was the floor.  
  
"You are just in time."  
  
"What is going on?" he asked, amused and smiling at the happy face of Pietro and at me for making such a mess probably.  
  
"We are having pancakes."  
  
He took his usual seat and asked: "If I remember correctly I gave you a list, since you wanted to do all the cooking. Pietro's breakfast has to be a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and two slices of whole wheat toast spread with butter and a special thick cut Old English marmalade that I have to order months in advance from the supplier."  
  
That man and his rules.  
  
"You're pretty strict," I told him, smiling.  
  
"I am strict," he answered proudly.  
  
"Time to live dangerously. We’re having pancakes." I smiled broadly at him and at Pietro.  
  
I saw Mr. Lehnsherr shaking his head and quietly chuckling.  
  
I brought three plates and we sat together for a breakfast.  
  
Pietro giggled, looking like he was having the time of his life.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr poured a tablespoon of maple syrup onto his pancakes and handed the bottle to Pietro who took about the same. I upended the bottle over my plate and let the liquid ooze out until my three pancakes almost floated in a light brown viscous sea.  
  
"Greedy… Sure you have enough?" Mr. Lehnsherr asked.  
  
"I can always add more." I grinned. It was a strange, intimate domestic situation, that I shouldn't enjoy as much as I did.

  
***

  
I put Pietro to bed earlier today, when Mr. Lehnsherr went to his study. He was working even at home.  
  
I grabbed myself some water and headed to my room to read a book. When I heard music. And more specifically, piano.  
  
I knew I should just go to my room, but the music called to me like a siren's song and drew me inexorably to it.  
  
The notes slid under the door of Mr. Lehnsherr's study and out into the hallway. They wrapped their fingers around me and drew me in. I opened the door just a little and saw him.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr sat at the piano.  
  
I stood by the door and watched as he played. No, not played. He didn't play the piano.  
  
He _enslaved_ it.  
  
His fingers moved with shocking speed and agility across the keys. He seemed a being of pure concentration right now. Did he even know I was standing there listening and watching and wanting him?

I didn't recognize the piece, but I wished I did. I wished I knew what he was playing and why he played it so intensely, as if he would die if he stopped.  
  
Minutes passed. Maybe an hour. I never grew tired of watching him. The music pinned me to floor the way his hands had pinned me many times in my fantasies.  
  
I couldn't move if I tried. I didn't try.  
  
Finally the piece ended and Mr. Lehnsherr lifted his hands off the keys. He kept his head bowed as if in prayer before lifting it. He didn't look at me.  
  
"You should go to bed."  
  
"I- I- yes- I'm so sorry. I just heard you playing so beautifully and- I-I'm sorry." My voice sounded small and timid.  
  
"Stop apologizing."  
  
"Sorr- okay. I didn't recognize this piece."  
  
"It's mine." His voice sounded stilted. Possessive.  
  
"You compose as well." I laughed genuinely, I didn't mean to, but this man was too much for me to take. He was perfect in every way. So I laughed. I didn't even thought he could take it the wrong way, because he always manages to read me so well. It's like he knows what I'm thinking even when I'm not sure myself.  
  
But I sensed tension in him once I was done laughing. His jaw was set tight and his posture stiff.  
  
"This is it. My inspiration," he said, finally turning to face me. And I was burning red.  
  
"What is?"  
  
"Your laugh. It's a good laugh. Do it again."

"I can't laugh on command." And then I let out a quiet laugh again. Apparently this man can make me do anything.  
  
"Go on," he said. "You know you want to laugh. And I know I want to hear you laugh."  
  
And I did it again. A nervous laugh, with my breath hitching as he was slowly approaching me.  
  
"Musical, light, turning deeper at the end and coming straight from your belly. It hit me in the gut like a spear point knife. I couldn't ignore that. I had to play it."  
  
I was totally fucked. It's inevitable.  
  
I'm falling too hard and too fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just Charles' normal week at the Lehnsherr's household ;))  
> Bless Resident Evil for being such a big part of my childhood too xD The one they were playing is [Resident Evil 6 - Sherry and Jake campaign](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m6e3r3hgr31qlq3dvo1_500.jpg) :))  
> And the little Swan Lake playing [cover](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/116379289482/chapter-3) xD


	4. Chapter 4

I’ve been here for two weeks now and I’ve gotten into a routine. I showered, dressed and scrounged for breakfast in the grand but near-empty kitchen. Pietro was still sleeping, and Mr. Lehnsherr must have left for work so I began a cursory exploration around the house again. It was beautiful, idyllic. And huge, I haven’t been able to explore it fully since I came here, with Pietro always on my hands. As I walked around the rooms I heard the slightest sound coming from one of them. I paused outside the closed door near the back of the house and heard the unmistakable sound of books sliding across a shelf.  
  
I entered the room and my eyes went wide. "Holy crap!" I whispered. The library was large and was stocked with row after row, case after case, of books. Enough books to start my own bookstore. It's always been a dream of mine. I worked at the school library before and I was kind of obsessed with books.  
  
"I knew I heard books," I said to myself, smiling, still admiring the view.  
  
"You hear books?" Mr. Lehnsherr's lightly sarcastic voice came from the far left corner of the library, and made me jump in surprise. I thought he left for work. And then I saw him. He was wearing a casual [dark blue](http://www.swagger.mx/media/bi/michael_fassbender.gif) shirt, and jeans. How could he pull off any look? _Stop it, Charles._ He was smirking at the way I was checking him out once again.  
  
"Interesting. Most people actually have to read them."  
  
"It's a gift," I said grinning. "What are you doing here, Mr. Lehnsherr? I thought you left for work."  
  
He walked towards a desk full with stacked books on top of it.  
  
"I'm rearranging my library today. It makes me relax, since I've been feeling a little… under pressure lately." His work must be really tiring. I heard he was a banker maybe? Like Richard Gere in _Pretty Woman_ , his company buys up other ones and sells them off piece by piece, or something like that. In other words - he's a filthy rich businessman. Filthy rich handsome businessman…

"So - you're a bibliophile too then," he said tauntingly and I stepped closer to his desk, smiling at his statement. Look at how original and funny he is… _damn it, Charles._  
  
"I am a bibliophile. A bibliofiend even." I teased him too. He brings it out in me. No harm in talking to him, right?  
  
He laughed, and I was knocked sideways by the handsomeness of his smile, all strong teeth, square jaw and twinkling eyes.  
  
"I knew it." His handsome features were almost luminous. I almost forgot what we'd been talking about.  
  
"How did you know?" I asked, puzzled.  
  
"You've got the look. The 'librarian look' as I like to call it. It's one of my favorite looks." I chuckled not having any idea what he was talking about but he amused me, and made me feel so comfortable talking to him, something I'd never been interested in, or allowed myself to do with my other employers.  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"Maybe I'll tell you someday."

  
***

  
I helped him with alphabetizing his books, we talked and it was really nice. Like really, really nice. _Good god, you have got to stop those thoughts Charles._  
  
"Oh my God," I exclaimed, sounding utterly shocked.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You're a nerd." That's right - we were at that stage when we teased each other, when even I was comfortable enough to tease him.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr only looked at me for a moment and then the book I was holding before laughing.  
  
"I am not a nerd. I just have a huge library," he said, flashing a look at me that nearly dropped me to my knees. I flushed. "I'm curious, Charles... And you're a curiosity. How about we talk some more over lunch. I won't be making it to work today."  
  
"Oh." That would be… wrong. And so nice. We've spent the nights together talking and I already have a crush on him, no need to go any deeper by spending the whole day with him. But he's just so charming and magnetic, I couldn't say no. "Okay. What would you like to know about me?"  
  
"Oh I will be quite unapologetically intrusive in my questions. Unconscionably so."  
  
"You have a big vocabulary, Mr. Lehnsherr,” I said, impressed, not fully aware how it sounded until I saw Mr. Lehnsherr’s mouth twitching to a wicked half grin.

  
***

  
So we did talk for the next few days and he really was interested in more and more personal stuff about me every day. But he made me feel at ease with him. He was like a serum of truth, I couldn't hide anything, even if I wanted to when he looked me with those piercing blue eyes. Of course he had no hesitation at bossing me around also, but even that I enjoyed.  
  
I feel like all I do is talk about him and I haven't told you that his son - Pietro - after a few weeks wasn't that difficult anymore. We were actually having fun together.  
  
I couldn't wait to tell Raven that I managed to bond with the 'so difficult child' that everyone else ran from.  
  
_"Let me guess - you're on your way home. But hey, you've been there for more than 2 weeks! That's a record, I should give you a medal."_  
  
"No, Raven. It's going pretty well actually." Yes, I was handling Pietro pretty well, but I'm not so sure I could handle my crush on his father…  
  
_"What!? I'm going to kiss your feet once you get back here. And when is that by the way?"_  
  
"Next week I think."  
  
_"Yay! We'll go out and you'll tell me all about that hot dad."_  
  
"Oh…"  
  
_"Oh? Correction- you'll tell me right now! What was that supposed to mean?!"_  
  
"I- um, I don't really know… but I think something is happening."  
  
_"What??!"_  
  
"Between us…"  
  
_"Come on, Charles. You're the only one I had faith in not to embarrass me, you're not one of those stupid bimbos-"_  
  
"I know, Raven. But I can't help it, he's so gorgeous as you said. And you know I'd never act upon any of my desires about him, but… he's also smart and charming… and those eyes and… he seems so…"  
  
_"Oh god, Charles. This is not good. Just finish your thoughts!"_  
  
"I mean, he's kind of flirting with me, I guess? I don't really know how to explain it, he's so different from anyone I've met."  
  
_"You sound like you're in love."_  
  
"I- I don't know, Raven. I know I like him. I can't stop thinking about him. It's not his money or even his looks, it's just… there's something about him… I can hardly string a sentence together when he's around me. That's not like me."  
  
_"It surely isn't."_

"And when he looks at me… I feel… like I've never felt before." And it scares the shit out of me. Because I've never been with anyone like him. A real man, a provider, a protector, a mystery.  
  
_"Promise me you'll be careful with him, Charles. He looks… dangerous. Hot, but very, very dangerous."_  
  
"I know that too… I won't act on my feelings, don't worry."

  
***

  
It should have been weird that I was hanging out with Mr. Lehnsherr so much, but it wasn't. I felt like we knew each other since forever. It felt like _he_ knew me since forever to be more specific. We were passionately discussing some books tonight after I put Pietro to bed.  
  
"God I love a man who reads," I said before I could stop myself. I was just having so much fun talking to him. And I had one drink, what was I thinking? Alcohol had always led me to bad decisions, although I don’t think that I need alcohol to send me into reckless mode with this man.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I- Mr. Lehnsherr, why did all the others leave?" I tried to change the subject quickly, but not very smoothly. "I mean, Pietro is a lovely kid and you're… not so bad-" He chuckled, raising his eyebrows.  
  
"Not so bad, huh?" I blushed immediately. What's up with the words that left my mouth lately?  
  
And then he turned his gaze away from me, putting on a really serious look, his thoughts drifting back to a time that wasn't probably pleasant for him.  
  
"My son and I… we have a very special connection. I've been torn away from him for a whole year. And since he got back to me, he's been pretty influenced by everything I do or say. And let me tell you that I don't like strangers taking care of my son, but with my job it's impossible to stay at home with him, and there's also that I hate the fact that I can't handle him on my own even when I'm here, and I blame only myself for him having to put up with divorced parents, but it is what it is. So I think my unconsciously negative behavior and thoughts to the other nannies, has an affect on him too. I didn't like them, so he didn't like them too."  
  
"But… he's been good to me."  
  
"Because I like you." Heat flared across my face again. My heart went in my throat and he smiled a sincere, kind smile, not his usual wicked one. "And I don't see how anyone wouldn't like you, even my son."  
  
"I like you too, Mr. Lehnsherr." What was I saying? What was I doing? What were we doing? We were sitting on the couch and I didn't even notice how close we'd gotten to each other.  
  
"What do you like about me, Charles?" His voice was soft, almost a whisper and he was staring into my eyes, making it impossible for me to hide the truth.  
  
"I- um-" I felt the blush rising into my cheeks as I stammered. It didn't help that he was smiling and staring at me this way.

"I-I d-don't know," I stammered awkwardly, because I knew exactly what I liked about him, I just didn't want to show him how much into him I was. "Like you...you're really intelligent. You read a lot. You seem to think about things other people don't think about. You're interesting. And weird." I chuckled saying the last one.  
  
"Weird?"  
  
"Good weird. I don't know...I'm starting to think nobody's like you."  
  
"I'm not the only one like me. I promise. Just the first of my kind you've met."  
  
"I don't know what that means." I chuckled, looking down at my hands.  
  
"You will find out some day."  
  
"I doubt that."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Because, you're… a very private man. I don't know… I feel like you know everything about me and I don't know that much about you."  
  
"Trust me, you do. I learned long ago that it was for the best that I erect a very high wall between myself and the rest of the world. I've never met anyone who simply ignores that wall as if it didn't exist, like you do."

"You're not as stern as you pretend to be, Mr. Lehnsherr," I teased him. Wine loosens my mouth and my… manners.  
  
"Careful, Charles...it's dangerous behind the wall."

  
***

  
For the next few days he continued to [stare](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/116633607022/chapter-4) at me with that intense look. Pietro and I were basically best friends now; even when Mr. Lehnsherr was at home we still played together.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr and I talked sometimes, but other times, like today, he just stared at me with an unreadable look. Even though I had gotten used to it in some way, it still excites me, lighting my cheeks on fire.  
  
I saw him exiting the room, with a fierce walk. His posture looked angry and determined to get out from the room.  
  
Pietro was yawning next to me and I stopped the movie we were watching.  
  
"Let's go to bed, little soldier."  
  
I quickly tucked him into his bed, wished him good night and kissed his head.  
  
Then I went back downstairs to look for Mr. Lehnsherr.

  
***

  
I searched around the house, until I found him in the library again.  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr?" My voice was quiet but it echoed in the big library. He didn't answer, he just stood by the desk, facing the windows.  
  
"You're really going to have to stop doing that," I heard him mutter, still with his back to me.

"Doing what?" I asked, confused.

"Blushing."

"I assure you, if I could avoid it, I would," I said nervously chuckling, feeling my cheeks getting hot again.

"But then I'd just have to make it my mission in life to make you blush. By whatever means necessary."

He turned around, coming closer to me. There was a dark look in his eyes, and my smile faltered a little. I swallowed and huffed out a shaky breath, my nervous habit of biting at my lower lip made his eyes flicker down to look at my mouth.   
  
_God help me!_  
  
I released my lip and licked over the abused flesh. He was coming my way like he was a hunter and I was his prey.  
  
"Do you have sexual fantasies about me?" he blurted out of nowhere.  
  
Oh dear lord. Brutal heat swept up my body from toes to ears. My cheeks flamed and I balked backwards from that question. His gaze was so piercing, so searching, coming closer to me and I took another step back until I hit the bookshelf behind me.  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr…" I breathed.  
  
"Do you? Answer me," he commanded. Getting closer and closer than we've ever been before, trapping me against the bookshelf. Good god he's tall. My head is pretty much chest-height with him right now and I have to tilt to see his face.  
  
"No…" My body was turmoil. What is he doing? A crazy part of me wanted to throw myself into his arms, the sensible part of me told me to run away as fast as I can. Our bodies were too close, this is dangerous.  
  
I want him to fuck me.  
  
Right here. Right now.  
  
The intensity of my own desire shocked me.  
  
"Don't lie to me. I hate liars more than anything!"  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr…" My voice was strained, pleading him for mercy.  
  
"Answer!" he demanded and I couldn't help but do as he said.  
  
"Yes, I have fantasies about you," I admitted with a shaky voice as I started quivering under him.  
  
"Sexual ones?" I had to lick my lips before answering. My mouth had gone suddenly dry.  
  
"Yes. Very," I said, breathlessly hoping he'll kiss me, even though I know it's wrong.  
  
"Very? I like the very."  
  
Was it possible to blush that much?  
  
I had never felt this exposed or vulnerable with a man before.  
  
Before I knew it he slammed me against the bookshelf, his whole body plastered against mine, his hands on my face and in my hair, kissing me with such urgency and fierce passion and desperation, like the meaning of life lay in my mouth. The kiss tore down whatever was left of the wall we'd tried to build up between us.  
  
We were welded from our mouths to our feet and we rutted and writhed, rubbing ourselves together as if we were trying to dissolve our clothes or catch fire. Probably both.  
  
I was moaning in the kiss like he was doing something entirely more to me than just kissing. But he didn't simply just kiss me. He devoured me. He possessed me with just a kiss. Anyone I'd ever kissed faded into obscurity.  
  
Then he pulled away and I was still panting in his embrace with my legs going completely jelly.  
  
"Definitely a librarian… you even taste like it…" he whispered, out of breath, still holding my face.  
  
"W-wh-at?" I was so out of this world dizzy after that kiss that I couldn't say even one word coherently. Erik's eyes were hooded, his voice dropped to a low, sultry tone that made my stomach do somersaults.  
  
"The librarian look, Charles… It's when you present yourself as meek and modest, unassuming, studious, quiet and shy. You can dress as if you're going to a funeral or with sweaters granny's made you, you can blush all you want or you can wear glasses and not say boo to a goose. But the fun starts when I peel back those layers and reveal the sexy, responsive little tempter underneath, the slut under the prim and proper outer shell. I love that transformation - from the Sunday School teacher to the panting whore in minutes."   
  
"Oh god…" I closed my eyes to better bring the vision to my mind, letting myself completely melt in his embrace.  
  
"You like the thought of me doing this to you?" His lips brushed against mine as he talked.  
  
"I shouldn't."  
  
"But you do?"  
  
"I do."  
  
"Very good. Now I want you to go to your room and touch yourself. Will you do that for me?"  
  
"Yes," I panted into his mouth and he continued to press against me.  
  
"Go. Before I do it myself." Oh sweet jesus. I didn't even try to move from my spot.  
  
"You are dangerous," he whispered against my lips. "You can make a man want things he can't have."  
  
He took a shuddering breath as if trying to calm himself.  
  
I have so many questions, but none of them leave my mouth, only my embarrassingly loud panting.  
  
"Go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally they confessed their 'feelings' xD  
> Erik is spot on about the librarian look of Charles ;))


	5. Chapter 5

[The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sleeping_Beauty_Quartet).  
  
Back in school I'd always hear some girls giggling over a copy of it. One of them had stolen it from her older sister. Gross, they said. Nasty, they said. So dirty. They couldn't believe people could actually like this, they said. So of course I stole a copy of it from the public library. Now on my third reading, I still haven't figured out why those girls in my class had called the book gross and nasty. I've fallen in love with the story of sexual slavery in a fairy-tale world of kings and queens. The Prince reawakens Beauty, not with a kiss, but with sexual initiation. His reward for ending the hundred years of enchantment is Beauty's complete and total enslavement to him, I've always found it fascinating. Even better, the main character - Beauty - was only fifteen, just like me when I first read it. Fifteen plus that one hundred years she’d been sleeping under the spell. I feel like I was also under a spell and I didn't know it. Maybe I’d fallen asleep and everything that had happened to me until now was a dream, a bad dream where my mother was a whore who wished I'd never been born. Maybe someday a prince would come along and kiss me and make love to me, and I’d wake up to discover I’d been someone else all along.  
  
Last night the dream ended. I got my kiss. The spell was broken.  
  
I woke up.  
  
The best and the worst thing that could have happened to me. Mr. Lehnsherr and I kissed. And it was like nothing I'd ever experienced before in my life - blazing hot, unbearable, like a fist in my stomach and a splinter in my mind.  
  
Despite all my best efforts to focus on the kid, I was focused on Mr. Lehnsherr. He's a complete mystery. A riddle.  
  
A Rubik's Cube. Impossible to let go of. You're compelled to keep playing with it until you figure it out.  
  
I couldn't face him the next day. I just couldn't. So I was hiding in my room all morning until I heard his car drive off. I felt pretty pathetic doing that, but I just couldn't handle bumping into him. My emotions were all over the place. That kiss... it was... well, I can't stop thinking about it. I've never been kissed like that before. To be taken over, to become part of someone else's body, to feel totally wild and free...  
  
What was I thinking? I have to confront him sometime. He was going to come back from work and then what?  
  
So the day went by with me crazily chewing on my lip and nails, waiting anxiously for Mr. Lehnsherr to come home. Okay, I have a plan. He won't say anything in front of Pietro, so I'll just make my escape to my room once I put him to bed. Good plan?  
  
I was watching Pietro from the window playing outside in the garden, when I made a call to Lily's house. I just hope she's doing good; changes are hard on children.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hey, Emma, is that you?" Raven must have sent Emma there. I don't know how good she is with children but every time I've run into her she just has that cold façade going on and bitch aura around her.  
  
"Yes, what do you want, Charles?" See what I mean.  
  
"I want to talk to Lily. Can you put her on the phone?"  
  
"No. She's not here." She was lying to me.  
  
"Is she alright?" I gripped the phone tighter.  
  
"Yes. Mr. Shaw asked me to ask you not to call here anymore."  
  
"But, I promised her-"  
  
"I don't care. Mr. Shaw is the boss, he's the man with the wallet and he's asking you not to call!"  
  
My heart felt stony and cold, my throat tightened and tears formed at the corner of my eyes. "But my girl- she needs to know I still care about her. I miss her. Please tell her that I called."  
  
Emma sighed with annoyance. "Mr. Shaw won't like that." And then the phone clicked off.  
  
I supported myself with one hand on the kitchen counter and let the tears fall. My chest felt all hard and empty.  
  
I needed to occupy myself with something or I was going to go crazy. I started cleaning around the house, until my hands were hurting. The more I hurt the better I felt. Pain made me feel better. It’s like white noise…soothing, calming, blocks out the real pain, the bad thoughts, that other pain that I don’t want.  
  
Kids are my life. One day I'm going to have a lot of kids, I'm going to adopt as many as they let me, I'm going to-  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr just stepped in the house with Pietro in his arms. I brushed my face with my sleeves quickly but I knew I couldn't fool him that I was crying.  
  
He froze immediately when he saw me and put Pietro down.  
  
"Go to your room," he commanded sternly to Pietro, and he ran off.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr stepped closer to me, his jaw clenching and unclenching as he studied the tears on my face. I felt warm inside that he was concerned about me, about my feelings and-  
  
I felt a hand in my hair pulling me and a firm, demanding mouth crushed my salty swollen lips, the kiss fierce and possessive, and startling. I didn't expect it at all. But a feeling of helplessness settled over me, disturbing and thrilling at the same time. I gave into the kiss, relaxing back against the kitchen counter.

"You are beautiful," he whispered against my lips.  
  
What?  
  
Tears are streaming down my face and he tells me I'm beautiful?  
  
His face was so close to mine, staring straight into my eyes as I trembled in his arms.  
  
"Don't do that."  
  
"What?"  
  
"You're showing me fear… that makes you an even more dangerous addiction to me." It's true I was scared of him, but not for the reasons you may think. Mr. Lehnsherr is so manly and rugged and hot. But the way he makes me feel - it's more than just sex appeal. It's like he can see inside my head. And _that_ is what scares me.  
  
"Why?"

"Because I'm like a big cat with a catnip toy if you give me your fear to play with." I smiled lightly.  
  
"How big of a cat are we talking about?" He smiled back at me, taking my face in his hands, brushing my cheeks with his thumbs.

"Lion. Big damn lion." He continued raining light, almost-caresses over my mouth with his lips, occasionally snaking out the tip of his tongue to meet mine.

"I like lions."

He chuckled and I immediately felt much better.

"Everything okay?" One of his hands slid around my waist, the other playing with my hair. I liked how he was touching me so gently. It made my body hum.  
  
"Mhmm." It is now. More than okay. When I'm in his arms everything is-  
  
_Stop it, Charles! What are you doing? This isn't you!_  
  
I let myself study him closer… his strong masculine jaw, those strangely sculpted lips. My eyes moved to his hands. A pianist’s hands, graceful, agile, precise. I love the way they feel on me…

And then I looked into his eyes. The most important part of him. Those beautiful laser blue eyes that look at me as though they'd never seen anything like me before.

  
***

  
So… yeah. We kissed again. I didn't know what was happening between us, and I didn't ask. He seemed like he didn't want to discuss it either.  
  
I tried to escape him tonight just like I had planned, but once he saw that he said "Stay." So I did.  
  
"What are you reading?" he asked.  
  
"I- ugh- nothing."  
  
"You're always walking around with that Kindle. What are you reading?"  
  
"It’s a- ugh romance."  
  
"My my my, Charles…are you telling me you read porn?"  
  
"No! It’s romance," I insisted. I felt the heat working its way up my neck and into my face.  
  
"That’s just code for porn."  
  
"No uh, there’s a storyline. Porn doesn’t have storylines."  
  
"Come on let me see." He reached out and pulled it from my hands. Oh no. I was so totally fired.  
  
His expression stilted. Of course, who'd want a pervert like me looking after their child-  
  
"The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty. Interesting read." His expression was not surprised, not disgusted.  
  
"I am so sorry, Mr. Lehnsherr-"  
  
" _'I find you very obedient and eager to please, and this makes me very happy. And I would forbid you all those tears if they weren't so beautiful. Do you want to please me?'_ " he quoted, his eyes never leaving mine.  
  
I knew those words perfectly, but the way he quoted them it was like they were coming from him.  
  
"O-oh, yes- I mean, s-so you've read it too?" He smiled lightly, seeming thoughtful.  
  
"Yes." I let out a breath of relief, that he wasn't bothered by my taste in books.  
  
"You must have read it as many times as me since you know the quotes." I chuckled, feeling a little calmer now.  
  
"Something like that."

  
***

  
It was time for dinner, I cooked Pietro's favorite spaghetti and I think in that moment I was his favorite person in the world.  
  
I put his plate before him and then I felt his tiny arms wrapping around me from where he was sitting. I smiled and hugged him back.  
  
"You okay, buddy?" I asked sweetly, suddenly concerned.  
  
"Yeah… but you're not leaving, are you?" he asked sadly, with that familiar tone I've heard from other kids.  
  
I quickly knelt next to his chair and looked into his sad eyes.  
  
"I'm not leaving, honey. What makes you say that?"  
  
"It's just… you've been acting strange lately…"  
  
"Oh I'm so sorry, darling. It doesn't have anything to do with you. I'm here. I promise." See, Charles. Look at how selfish you are to lust after your boss and completely ignore the poor kid's feelings.  
  
And Mr. Lehnsherr just walked in the kitchen too. I've accepted the fact that I can't describe to you how handsome he looks every time, with his suit and-  
  
Wait. Why was he wearing a suit? Should I have dressed up too?  
  
"Oh, that's a little formal for dinner, don't you think?" I chuckled, teasing him.  
  
"I'm going out actually," he stated, unmoved by my sad gasp.  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yes. Goodbye buddy." He leaned down and kissed Pietro's head, heading for the hallway without even looking at me. Something clenched in my chest and I felt like I was about to burst into tears again like yesterday.  
  
So I followed him to the door.  
  
"When are you going to be back?" I asked. Did I sound like a jealous wife or is it just me?  
  
"Later." And here's my unfaithful asshole husband.  
  
"You going on a date or something?" I chuckled nervously. _Jesus Charles! What are you saying?_  
  
He smiled sheepishly at me. "Yes."

  
***

  
I barely got some sleep that night, I was wondering if Mr. Lehnsherr's lips were on someone else's tonight, if he gifted someone else with those intoxicating kisses, if his hands were wrapped tightly around someone else, if-  
  
A loud noise from downstairs brought me out of my thoughts. It was 3 am so I jumped out of bed and went down to see what's going on.  
  
I found Mr. Lehnsherr sitting, half lying on the couch with a glass of whiskey in his hand. His shirt was messily open and his tie was hanging loose around his neck. He looked hot. And drunk.  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr? Are you okay?" He looked my way, slowly. His eyes were bloodshot, and I could feel fierceness in his stare that the alcohol was ready to unleash, I just didn't in what form it would come out.  
  
"No." His tone was dead cold. He took a big sip of his glass, draining it and then poured himself some more, putting the bottle back on the table with a loud thumping sound. Jesus, he was really drunk. He was going to wake up Pietro, I couldn't let his son see him like that.  
  
I went his way to help him stand up and lead him to his room and muttered, "Please, let me help you, sir-" A loud cracking sound made me flinch from him, and I saw he had broken the glass in his hand, which has scattered tiny pieces of glass all over him and his hand was bleeding. "Oh god-"  
  
I quickly got some napkins from the table and knelt in front of him, taking his hand in mine. He started trembling, it must have hurt a lot. But that's some strength.  
  
"What did you just say?" His voice rumbled from above me, but I was afraid to look up. I was too close to him, he was drunk, I liked him, this closeness could only lead to bad things, I couldn't let myself be weak again, so I kept my focus on cleaning his hand from the glass.  
  
"What-"  
  
" _'Please, let me help you…'_ " His voice was commanding me to continue what I was saying earlier.  
  
"I just wanted to help you to your room, sir?" I said, confused. That's what I wanted to say. And suddenly I felt his free hand slide onto my shoulder, roughly squeezing me. It had me gasping in surprise and, of course, excitement. I looked up to see a twisted expression on his face. His eyes closed and I just stayed there, kneeling between his legs, not knowing if I did or said something wrong.  
  
He leaned closer to my face until his forehead bumped into mine. I stopped breathing.

My everything is ready to be taken by this man. Every cell in my body was magnetically attracted to Mr. Lehnsherr. Sex would be outstandingly good, for sure. Hot, sweaty, fast and furious fucking which would make me relieved Mr. Lehnsherr's bedroom was a long way from Pietro's. We were going to be noisy for sure.  
  
I shouldn't be even thinking about this at all! Mr. Lehnsherr's delicious voice brought me from my thoughts.

"This is where you should always be." He breathed in my face, and I felt the scent of the whiskey getting to me. I lost all focus on his words. This was happening. No matter how much chatter my brain was trying to filter, this was fucking happening. I wanted him. I fucking wanted Erik Lehnsherr, like it or not, I did. I wanted him to own me, my mind, body, and soul. "Always…" he repeated again, now looking into my [eyes](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/116904783527/chapter-5).  
  
The desires that illuminated from both our bodies was just as intense as the hunger in our stares.  
  
"Where?" I asked, a desperate gasp leaving my mouth with the question.  
  
"At my feet."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Charles was born a submissive, how lucky is Erik to have him exactly where he wanted him :))  
> Next chapter we'll pick up exactly where we left off. What is Charles going to do?


	6. Chapter 6

_"This is where you should always be."  
_  
_"Where?"  
_  
_"At my feet."_  
  
His face was inches from mine and I was panting loudly without even having any contact with him yet. I was staring into his eyes and I felt like I was falling into them, completely drunk on his scent - whiskey, soap and man. Clean, yet dirty. Sexy.  
  
He closed the distance between us and kissed me with such force that I staggered back in astonishment. He clamped his hand to the back of my neck, pressed his tongue hard against my lips and I came to my senses, opened my mouth and began to kiss him back. My heart pounded as we ate at each other in a breath-stealing, pulse-racing, greedy binge that had me whimpering and moaning desperately in his mouth.  
  
With one hand roughly feeling the center of my back, the other twisted into my hair, hard and painful, but so damn good. My body was screaming. I felt pressure building, as though I might explode. And it’s only from a kiss.  
  
His hands became more frenzied on me, mauling and bruising in their strength, and the kiss turned into an attack, his mouth devouring me, fierce and unrelenting.  
  
He tilted his head and thrust his tongue deeper inside my mouth, tangling with mine. I don't hear his moan. I feel it. A desperate moan. It tingled on my lips and it vibrated through my body.

His hands were wildly grasping at me, as hard on my body as his lips were kissing me. Until he reached my hips, sliding to cup my ass perfectly in his hands and lifted me in one strong movement so I was straddling his lap. All of that happened in second, while he still feasted on my mouth.  
  
I was so lost in pleasure, I forgot all about his son. I tried to get a hold of my moans, of my body, but they were betraying me.  
  
He pressed me against his chest harder, angling my hips so my ass was brushing his cock… "Oh god," I shamelessly moaned, both tormented and turned on. He rocked our hips together, his erection pressing into my ass, causing a strangled sound to escape my throat.  
  
Then I heard his belt unbuckle, then the unzipping, and then, "Oh Mr. Lehnsherr, w-wait…" I panted, so aroused, like I was some slut.  
  
"Say it again… it's been so long…" he gasped against my mouth.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Call me _sir_." He stroked my bottom lip.  
  
I was confused and so damn turned on even more when I said it. "Sir…" I said into his lips. He hissed and pulled back, looking at me.  
  
"Oh Jesus." A groan of need and passion escaped him.  
  
The hand on my back now slipped down to my hips, gripping them tight enough to leave a mark.

"It's never sounded that way from anyone… the way you say it," Mr. Lehnsherr growled. "Don't you understand? You're meant to be mine." He kept a tight hold of me, getting tighter every second.  
  
"Oh Mr. Lehnsherr," I gasped brokenly. "Please." Please stop? Please don’t stop? I didn't know what I begged for, only that I had to beg for it.  
  
I couldn't control my moans, Pietro could come down any minute and see the picture of me in his dad's lap.  
  
"W-we s-shouldn't, Mr. Lehnsherr-" I need to be strong. I need to be …  
  
I tried to pull from his lips but instead I kissed him harder.  
  
"Yes, we most definitely should," Mr. Lehnsherr said with a groan. My head was spinning as we kissed raw.  
  
He pulled away again, just to press his fingers against my lips. "Open." I complied, opening my mouth in an instant, shuddering when Mr. Lehnsherr slipped two fingers inside. "Suck." I did, shutting my eyes as I remembered just the other day that he had ordered me to please myself.  
  
I sucked hard, running my tongue around his fingers, knowing very well where they were going to end up, and I wanted it, oh God how I wanted it. What did he think of me right now? Slutty? Whorish?  
  
I felt those wet fingers slipping in the back of my pajama bottoms, sliding into the seam of my ass, rubbing on my hole. I gasped as he sank a finger into me. In time, with the partners I've had, I learned how to open myself so well the Titanic could enter me.  
  
He could feel the pleasure I was taking in this so he easily added a second finger and finally a third. With just spit for lube, it was a bit tricky, I have to admit. But if I had any skill in bed, this was it, so I forced myself to relax further, pushing my ass down, impaling myself on Mr. Lehnsherr's fingers.  
  
He was twisting his fingers inside me, while his lips were on mine, kissing me with such heat and passion that for a moment I didn’t know where I am… even who I am.  
  
"You're so hot…" His teeth grazed my lobe. "Inside and out. Hot and tight…"  
  
Goose bumps erupted on my skin as I was riding his fingers, burning with a mix of pain and pleasure but I wanted more.  
  
"Tell me you want me," he whispered.  
  
What? Me fucking on his fingers and moaning like a whore wasn't enough?  
  
"I want you."  
  
It was impossible to run away from this.  
  
God. I feel like I'm burning. Melting. But at the same time, cold little shocks run through my whole body.  
  
I heard myself let out little murmurs and moans as his hands moved to remove my pajama bottoms and threw me [on the couch](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/117182054077/chapter-6) beside him, spreading my legs.  
  
I felt him freeing himself from his trousers, and gasped as the weight of him pressed along my thigh.  
  
I raised my head so I could get a better view and- Holy sweet mother. A long, hard, thick cock sprang free. I gasped, the size alone is impressive. Thick, pulsing and oh so erotic.  
  
He gripped a foil packet, I didn't even know where he got it, and tore it open with his mouth. I couldn't move my eyes from that impressive erection.  
  
His hands pushed my legs further apart, before he plunged into me so quickly and deeply that I let out a startled cry – somewhere between shock, pain and pleasure.  
  
"Oh my god," I murmured, all resistance gone. I could barely think, let alone protest.  
  
He began to move and I moaned.  
  
I cried out and tightened around him, a burning pain shot through me as I stretched to accommodate his large length.  
  
"Oh god, oh god." I couldn't, I just couldn't, all the willpower wouldn't be enough to control my moans, and they were getting louder and louder with every thrust. I put my hand over my mouth.  
  
"Oh how nice it would be to gag you…" he growled in a strained voice as he began thrusting harder and faster.  
  
He hissed, looking down at me falling apart, and I groaned as he jerked his hips back, and filled me again and again. Pleasure was soon overriding the pain and I wrapped my legs around his hips, pulling him down closer to me, wanting it deeper.  
  
My hands grasped at his backside, and I let out another long moan as I pulled him in deeper.  
  
He pushed me hard into the sofa, rocking me back and forth into him, and I melted beneath [him](http://38.media.tumblr.com/cf510bd29eab0583950422372a13f3bc/tumblr_inline_nn9v0mXdg51rz76ut_500.gif). I groaned and arched up to him as my hole clenched, begging for more.  
  
His eyes were locked on mine, radiating from them everything I felt. This was lust at its finest - primal passion, visceral hunger.  
  
He gripped my hands and put them above my head, holding them firmly in one of his, and I don't want to escape him anymore. I don't want to be anywhere but here, under his huge, strong body.  
  
I writhed and moaned from the gesture, showing him exactly how much I loved it. He responded by groaning and pumping harder and faster, pulling all the way out, then plunging in over and over again, his fingers tight around my wrists. Then he leaned down and captured my mouth in another rough, heated kiss.  
  
He groaned an animal groan with every thrust into my body.  
  
We moved together, in sync, and I was overcome with pleasure.  
  
"Oh. Oh," I moaned, feeling my body being pounded into the sofa. I bit my lip so hard that I drew blood, and I grabbed great handfuls of sofa cushion. Tears were streaming from my eyes, from pleasure and from trying too hard not to scream. He growled and his movements went wild at the picture of it. I clenched so tightly around him I'm nearly sure it hurts.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr shifted into a punishing rhythm, driving into me so forcefully that I could barely breathe.  
  
Just as heat built up, he pulled out.  
  
I felt cool air between my legs and a throbbing, aching feeling that cries out for him to be back inside of me.  
  
"Don't stop," I cried. "Please."  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr flipped me over so my face pressed right into the sofa, and my backside stuck up in the air.  
  
"Please, sir…" I was literally aching for him to be back inside me.  
  
He rubbed a rough hand over my buttocks, squeezing and releasing, hissing at the sight.  
  
He pulled my legs wide open and plunged so deeply inside me that I screamed with pleasure.  
  
I clamped down hard against the fabric, trying to keep quiet, my screams turning to stifled moans as he pumped harder.  
  
I felt Mr. Lehnsherr pushing his weight right against my backside so I was rubbing my cock against the sofa. Every few strokes he pulled my legs wider and wider apart, going eye-wateringly deep.  
  
I bit my lip and moaned, my fingers tightening more and more on the sofa cushions. I was so near to coming now that I wanted to scream out. To shout, 'don’t stop!' To beg him for more. But all I could do is make muffled moaning sounds as Mr. Lehnsherr pounds away.  
  
His breaths were coming harsh in my ear. He was fucking me hard and raw and delicious, but I still felt like he was holding back.  
  
Then he covered my mouth with his hand, and it was a too rough gesture but it's what got me almost finished. He was hitting that perfect spot as his thrusts became more measured. I whimpered his name, biting my lip to stop my blissful cries. I was on the edge, a few more of those perfect thrusts and I was going to come so hard.  
  
He picked up my backside and hips and put my knees on the sofa so he could get even deeper.  
  
He did everything expertly. Like he knows my body so well. Like we've had sex a million times before. And within seconds of moving like that, a huge orgasm swept over me, going all the way from my shoulders to my toes, tearing me apart.  
  
I screamed behind his palm as I kept coming, unable to recognize my own ragged cries.  
  
I could still feel him moving inside me, and every stroke made my orgasm longer and stronger.  
  
He pulsed hard and deep, and I could feel my release milking him. When I stopped shuddering, my head dropped back into the cushions.  
  
Just as the waves were easing off, I heard Mr. Lehnsherr moan and thrust extra hard into me, pulling me onto him, grasping my thighs to his as he filled the condom, and rested his face on my back.  
  
I felt his chest moving up and down against my back as his breathing slowed. He was grasping my thighs so tight, it hurt like hell and I know I'll have red finger marks.  
  
That was, without a doubt, the best fucking orgasm I've ever had.  
  
After a few moments of bliss, Mr. Lehnsherr slid free of me, and I rolled over to face him, feeling oddly shy all of a sudden.  
  
I forced my comfortably numb body to sit up, whimpering because I hurt everywhere. My whole body hurt, from coming so hard and from Mr. Lehnsherr's rough grip.  
  
I was a sticky mess which had gotten onto the sofa too, so I tried to cover myself with my abandoned pajama on the floor.  
  
I faced him, heat flooding my cheeks. What the fuck, I was turning into a fifteen year old boy all over again. I'm fucking blushing on him again, after I'd just let him fuck me into oblivion. His chest was rising and falling with hard breaths as he gazed back at me, looking like he's ready to take me again.  
  
"What did I tell you about that?" His voice was low. My eyes savored every contortion and lustful grimace that crossed Mr. Lehnsherr's face, my own gaze mesmerized by his commanding, intense, blue eyes.  
  
"About what?" I asked cluelessly, feeling shyer than ever.  
  
"Blushing. You have no idea how hard it makes it."  
  
"How hard it makes what?"  
  
He didn't answer immediately. He cocked his head to the side and studied me before he answered.  
  
"Staying away from you."  
  
I looked down at my hands and bit my lip to keep the smile of pure pleasure from emerging.  
  
_You shouldn’t be happy about that comment, you idiot!_  
  
But I am.  
  
"Good God, that's not helping either."  
  
My eyes flickered up. He had straightened and was running his fingers through his hair, his head bowed.  
  
"What did I do now?" Feeling awkward and suddenly adolescent, I gave an embarrassed chuckle.  
  
"You're biting your lip and…God! It just makes me want to kiss you until you can't stand it." He sounded almost pained and I don't know why, since we already did everything. Maybe he's regretting it… As he should, as I should, but I don't.

"Come here," he said, the way he makes me do everything without second thought. I went closer to him. He kissed my lips, demanding, but gentle. I relaxed into the kiss, savoring the gentle way he explored the bruised contours of my mouth and lips. He pulled away and cupped my face with his palm. I leaned into it, closing my eyes.

"Did I hurt you?" He ran his thumb over my swollen lip, smearing the blood from all the biting I did.

"No."

"Don't lie to me." I never could. I felt his hand slip between my legs, touching the soft spot he was inside a few minutes ago. When he pulled away there were little strains of blood on his fingers.

"Just a little… but I liked it," I whispered, assuring him that it was more than pleasurable for me. I couldn't tell him that's the best sex I'd ever had, how pathetic would that sound? I felt him shudder beside me so I opened my eyes to see his, which were not filled with guilt but with pleasure.  
  
My eyes fell to his lips, with the need to kiss him again.  
  
"You like it rough, Charles?" The desire he said that with… God. A pocket of lava burst inside my stomach and released heat throughout my body. His eyes, his words were like a touch. And I craved that touch. Once was not enough. I don't know how many times it will take for me to feel satisfied.  
  
"I like it rough." _With you._ I didn't say it, but it's true. I'd take everything this man wants to give me. I've never had such rough sex in my life. I've had my fair share with men, but never like this. And this - I want more than anything now. With him.

"How rough, on the scale of one to ten?"

"What's one?" I asked with a voice that sounded too innocent; I wanted to slap myself for it.  
  
"You fall asleep while I'm on top of you." I laughed easily, as every time I'm around him.  
  
"Ten?"

"Hospitalization." I wanted to laugh again, but his deadly serious face stopped me from doing so.

I thought for a moment. Right now I'd die in his arms, that's how much I wanted him. And I wanted more, and more. So much more. More time with him. More conversations. More sex. Definitely more sex like _that_.  
  
"Nine," I answered.  
  
"Nine. Nine is very rough. You might want to think about that." There's nothing to think about, I wanted to say, completely childishly. "Go to your bed now and think it through. I have some things I need to think about too."

I wanted to ask what things, but I knew I'd never get an answer from him. So I did the only thing that I wanted to do - to please him. And I went to my room as he wished.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well... I don't know what to say xD  
> Hope you enjoyed it xD


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little warning, dears - there are some mentions of prostitution and underage sex in this chapter. Nothing explicit, but I thought I should warn you.

I was too excited to sleep after what happened between me and Mr. Lehnsherr last night, so I was awake earlier this morning. As I was making my way downstairs I heard him talking on the phone. So he was up earlier too…  
  
_"Yes, he's everything we've talked about."_  
  
I didn't want to interrupt his conversation so I just waited until he was done.  
  
_"You wouldn't believe it."_  
  
_"Yes, and I can't…"_ I heard Mr. Lehnsherr sighing sadly.  
  
When he finished his call I stepped into the living room and greeted him with a cheerful, but a little shy, 'good morning'. I woke up satisfied to say the least. But he looked worried. I waited for him to say something, until…  
  
"So how was your date last night?" I shot out of nowhere. Great start to the conversation, Charles. Really smooth.  
  
He looked at me, confused. "What? Oh no. I wasn't on a date, Charles. I'm sorry I said that. I just needed some time… away from you."  
  
"Why?" He walked away from me and sat on the couch. But even with more space between us, I'm still breathless. I have a feeling I will always be this way in his presence. The question is: How long can I survive without air?

"Charles, we need to talk." Oh no.  
  
He gestured for me to sit beside him on the very same couch we fucked on with such passion last night. I could still see the stain of my come on the cushion which I brushed sloppily with a napkin. I have to do laundry today….  
  
The abrasions on my body hurt with every brush of my clothing, my ass ached and spasmed when I sat and my lips were chapped raw and swollen from biting. It felt amazing.  
  
"Yes?" I asked with a shaky voice.  
  
"I think it would be best if I find someone else to take of Pietro now, because-"  
  
I didn't hear anything else, my head started spinning, and I felt so stupid that I thought it would be okay to sleep with him and keep my job. I was never ever going to find another job again. Well as a whore maybe, but as a nanny never.  
  
This was the price I had to pay for the kiss that couldn't be unkissed, for the apple that couldn't be unbitten, for the road I had taken. We had gone too far now. We could no longer go back.  
  
I never wanted to go back.  
  
"Charles, are you listening to me?" Tears began to burn at the back of my eyes. I had to close them to chase away the threat.  
  
I didn't hear anything else after he said I was fired. And I was so angry, he made it impossible for me not to fall for him. He seduced me. Okay, it wasn't entirely his fault, I was lusting after him since I first saw him in the rain that night. And now…  
  
I was the whore once again.  
  
"I'll bring you some water." He disappeared from my sight before I could say anything. But I couldn't leave things like that, I had to tell him I'm not how he thought I was, even if I was fired.

  
***

  
"I'm not a whore," I cried out, stepping into the kitchen. He turned abruptly to see me crying. "I'm not a whore," I repeated again.  
  
"Charles." He stepped closer to me. "Sleeping with me doesn't make you a whore, it just makes me a very bad man. Spending the night with you...it was selfish of me."  
  
"No, I-"  
  
"Come here. Sit down." He was trying to soothe me but he still sounded so commanding. "What is it? Tell me." How could he see right through me?  
  
"Nothing, I just didn't want you to think that I do this often-"  
  
"I know you don't. But you were having some sort of panic attack just now. Tell me about it."  
  
"No… I can't…" I looked down my hands and he took one of them in his. How could he make me feel so comfortable in his presence? I didn't even know him that much and I wanted to tell him all my secrets.  
  
"So there really is something. Tell me. Did I hurt you last night?" he asked, concerned, and I looked at his face full with worry.  
  
"No. You didn't… I just-"  
  
"Just tell me. What are you afraid of? You can tell me. Trust me, I've heard worse. And even if I haven't, I've _thought_ worse. So just say it." I looked away again, escaping his gaze which would make me tell him everything. Tears stung my eyes again from helplessness.  
  
He took my chin to face him and spoke softly.  
  
"I'm going to tell you a story of my own, and then you'll tell me yours." He took a deep breath and squeezed my hands. "Once upon a time, an untouchable man went everywhere he wanted to and did everything he wanted to. And nobody ever tried to stop him. Until one day something did stop him. And he ended up at a faraway place from everything and everyone. He thought it was the worst thing that could have happened to him, and it really was. But the hurt repaid him. If he didn't end up at that place he wouldn't have met an angel. An angel who needed to learn how to talk. So guess what the man did?"  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
He brought his mouth onto mine and forced my lips apart.  
  
"He gave him his tongue," he whispered into the kiss. He had me completely without another sentence. So I opened for him once again.  
  
"I'm not a whore… like my mother." Why did I have to tell him this?  
  
"Is your mother still alive?"  
  
"I don't know… I left home a couple of years ago…"  
  
"What about your father?"

"I-I don't know him."  
  
"I want to hear everything, Charles. And you're going to tell me."  
  
"I- she was working at home. She was bringing men into her room…" A tear streamed down my face, because I was telling him my most private secrets. And I wanted him to know. To know me. He brushed it away and with a soothing and encouraging voice urged me to continue.  
  
"She didn’t work every night, but she did it more often than not. I could always hear them," I admitted quietly as my mind went back in time.  
  
"Screams and moans and grunts and growls. I was so young and I always wondered what they were doing, but she made me promise never to come into her room. So I didn't. For a long time. But one night when I was nine years old, the door to her room was slightly open. I don't know if it wasn't closed well, or maybe someone forgot to close it. I just know that when I got up and made my way to the bathroom, it was open. I was curious, of course. What child wouldn't be?" I chuckled bitterly. "So when I saw that the door was open, I went to look. That first time, I was more confused than ever. I saw my mother, face down on the bed, and some guy behind her, with a twisted expression on his face, holding her down, touching her… while he…did things to himself."  
  
I couldn't even say the word masturbate to Mr. Lehnsherr and I let him fuck me last night. I fell silent, so he asked a question to prompt me to continue. "How was your mother reacting?"  
  
"She looked… I tried not to look at her, at the time it sounded to me like she was in pain, but when he stopped, she begged for more."  
  
"How did that make you feel?"  
  
"I was angry. And confused. And torn. I wanted to say something, to make him stop hurting my mother, but I knew I'd get in trouble for watching, so I didn't say anything."  
  
"Did you go back to your room?"  
  
I gave a long, tell-tale pause. "No."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
I shrugged. "Fear. Curiosity. I’m not sure."  
  
"Was that the only time you saw her?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Did you like watching her?"  
  
"No!" I said emphatically. "Oh, God no! It was horrible. And I tried not to watch her, only her… clients."  
  
"Then why did you?"  
  
"I was afraid she might get hurt… And I didn't watch for the longest time. I would put a pillow over my head to drown out the sounds. But… It wasn't until I heard more than just one person's voice that I ever went back to her door at night."  
  
"And how old were you then?"  
  
"Fourteen."  
  
"Tell me about it."  
  
My chest rose and fell with my deep inhalation. "I went because I was afraid for my mother. I didn't know what more than one person might do to her. So I crept down the hall and stood in front of her door. I stood there and just listened for a while. It was when I started to hear some banging around that I was brave enough to finally twist the door knob and crack the door just a tiny bit. I did it and then ran back to my room, just in case someone inside noticed."  
  
"And did they?"  
  
"No, no one noticed. I’m pretty sure they were too busy enjoying themselves."  
  
"So did you go back?"  
  
"Yes," I said in a small voice. "I did. I waited until I was sure no one would notice and I crept back down the hall and pushed it open just enough so I could see inside."  
  
"And what did you see this time?"  
  
"My mother was with another woman and a man on the bed. Both the woman and the man were doing things to her. To each other, too. When I was relieved she wasn't being hurt, I started to back away…"  
  
"But you didn’t?"  
  
"No. That's when I saw the other couple in the room…"  
  
"And what were they doing?"  
  
"A boy, who didn't even look much older than I was at the time. Maybe just by few years. He was on his knees with his face on the floor. His hands were tied behind his back and a man was holding on to them as he pushed something in and out of the boy. Hard. And fast. He was moaning, he looked like he was really enjoying it and the man behind him was telling him to take it all like a good little boy."  
  
"Did that scare you?"  
  
My mouth opened and closed twice before I spoke again. My face twisted, fighting the tears of embarrassment, but they poured down my cheeks anyway. He put his arm around me and whispered "It's okay." I was going to be fired anyway, no need to hide how perverted I was, so I just spilled it out.  
  
"No. I envied the boy. I wanted to be in his place." I cried after I admitted it. But he didn't look disgusted with me and not a tiny glimpse of surprise crossed his face.  
  
Hot shame ate at the already significant hollow part of my belly.  
  
"For the first time I felt arousal. I couldn't stop watching them," I looked at him and said as if to question why I felt that way. "I went into my room after and-"  
  
"Masturbated?" I nodded in embarrassment.  
  
"In time I found myself feeling more and more embarrassed, but not because I was gay, but because of what I felt that night."  
  
"Were these the only times you saw things like that?"  
  
"No. I watched a few times after that, but only when I knew there were other people in there, not just my mother."  
  
"And were those experiences similar?"  
  
"For the most part. There was another man who was a regular and he acted the same way as the other man with the boy… It seemed like with them pain was equaling pleasure."  
  
"Did your mother ever find out that you watched?"  
  
"No… I don't know." I answered in a small voice. "But he saw me…"  
  
"What was that night like?"  
  
I laughed. It was a bitter sound. "I think it's safe to say it was the night it all went to shit." I paused again, to gather strength to relive that night in the retelling of it. "I was sixteen and he… saw me. That man. He smiled at me, while they were… so I ran back to my room. After a while I heard a knock. I was scared, because I knew it might be him but I opened the door and he was standing there. I let him in and he kept telling me how beautiful I was. Just like my mother. And like a naïve kid I was flattered and liked the attention I got from the man I liked. I'd seen him a couple of times and he was just as rough at what he did as the first man I saw who was fucking that boy. At the time I couldn’t tell the difference between being turned on by someone and liking them. He didn't do anything to me that night. He left. But a couple of nights later he came back. He told me he missed me and I was a goner. He looked like he cared about me more than my own mother so… you can figure out what happened next. He knew I was a virgin, he was gentle with me, but I wanted him to do to me what he was doing to the others. I just didn't know how to say it. And he kept coming back almost every night, fucking me for months. He was a boyfriend to me in my head. And I stopped peeking at my mother's door, afraid I'd see them together. But one night after I'd gone to sleep I heard him sneaking out. Then I heard my mother's voice too, they were talking and I jumped out of my bed. I was afraid she’d found out and she'd make me stop seeing him. I thought I loved him… I opened the door just a little and I saw him giving her money. My heart broke that he was still having sex with her, like I wasn't enough. So a whimper left my mouth and they heard me. I cried and foolishly asked him why. My mom got furious with me for being so whiny and then she said _"I seriously don't know why you pay to fuck that whiny bastard"_. That's when I found out she was selling me too.  
  
She said the whole thing was my fault for being out of bed when she had visitors. She accused me of doing something to bring Colin to my bedroom, to lead him on. She said that I'd gotten what I deserved for being a cock tease. She said I had what it takes to be a whore so she just took the opportunity.  
  
So I ran away from home that night and never looked back. It was a relief for her to get rid of me, she never came looking for me. I went to my best friend Hank. He was just two years older than me from my school. His parents were rich and they sheltered me for a long time, but then I found this job and life seemed a little brighter. I became a better parent to those kids who weren't mine than my mother was ever to me. Hank's parents helped me get into university with some finances, I was like a son to them but I made sure to give them at least half of it back."  
  
He petted my hair gently and I let out a deep breath that I was holding. "So now you know me. I'm a freak. And a whore. I'll go pack-"  
  
"You're not a freak. Nor a whore. You are perfect," he said with such confidence and decisiveness that I almost believed him.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You are perfect. And you were made for me. Do you know that? You were put on this earth for me." He was looking straight into my eyes, showing me that he really meant all of this.  
  
I could feel my face getting hot. Again. I don't think I've blushed as much in my entire life as I have since meeting Mr. Lehnsherr. And it makes it even worse that I know he likes it. For some reason, that excites me. I _want_ him to like it. I _want_ him to like me, _want_ him to want me. I shouldn't. But I do.

"I'm afraid I don't understand, Mr. Lehnsherr," I managed to squeeze out quietly over the pounding of my heart.  
  
"There's so much I can give you, so much I want to give you, that I'm physically aching." He took my chin in his hand, forcing me not to miss a second of his speech which was filled with so much passion. "I can make you feel. Really feel." He pulled me even closer to him and I stared like I was hypnotized.  
  
"Excitement," he said, reaching up to wind a little bit of my hair around his finger.  
  
His eyes never leaving mine, I felt like he was doing the same thing [to me](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/117513339867/chapter-7) \- winding me around his finger.  
  
"Anticipation. Desire. Warmth." He spoke slowly, making each word more erotic than it should sound. "I can make you feel very, very warm."  
  
As though his words alone could evoke the sensation, I felt hot blood rush to the surface of my skin and pool in my stomach.  
  
"You might even feel a little fear," he continued softly. "But even that can be intoxicating in its own way."  
  
I was mesmerized by his words, caught off guard by his honesty. I'm surprised and I'm a little afraid. But I'm also all in. I feel it in my bones.  
  
"I'll be driving Pietro to his mother today. Stay with me."

"What?"

"Stay with me so I could show you everything I want to give you." My everything is saying yes to this man and to the things he's offering to me without even knowing what they are. He has me. My attention, my attraction, my curiosity, my desire… He saw I was considering it and spoke.

"You're curious, Charles. Curiosity will get the best of you. And then, in the end, so will I."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, we finally found out that Charles was born this way. Good thing he found the person he belongs to :))


	8. Chapter 8

What was I doing here?  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr went to drive his son to his mother and I waited for him to come back. To… God knows what to do. How could I have agreed to this?  
  
I was pacing around the house nervously the whole day. I couldn't sit in one place even for a second, so I grabbed the keys to my car and went to find a sanctuary.  
  
I stepped into the confessional as I did many times before at my church, but for the first time I didn't feel like I needed forgiveness.

"Forgive me Father for I have…" I paused, not being able to finish my confession.

"Sinned?" the Father finished for me.

"I-I'm not really sure, Father."

"Why do you say that my child?"

"Because… I did something, but…"

"Did it feel like a sin?"

"No. It felt like love."

 

***

 

I went back to the house and my anxiety continued as I waited. A few hours later, when it was already dark, he came back.  
  
I heard his car and I started shivering with anticipation. I didn't know what to expect to happen now, but I was looking forward to it.  
  
Mr. Lehnsherr entered through the front door, wearing light linen pants and a [black shirt](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/d4/bb/ff/d4bbff08c46b715e23b2ed6367b90440.jpg), unbuttoned to reveal a little of his chest, with the sleeves rolled up. I'm pretty sure I've never seen anything sexier.

"I was afraid you'd changed your mind," he said as he came closer to me.

"No you weren't," I blurted. He knew I would stay. Maybe more than I did. It's disconcerting, but it's true. He knows he's got me.

"No, I wasn't," he replied honestly. And he grinned. For the first time, I get to see him completely relaxed, he had teased and taunted me before, but this is a genuine happy smile. And I'm totally disarmed. Here is yet another deadly dimension to this dangerous man.

"At least you're honest," I muttered as I looked down at my feet, not really sure what I was doing here with this man, but his fingers gently took my chin and made me look in his eyes.  
  
"I'm always honest." Somehow I believed him. His hand went into my hair and brought me to his lips. He kissed me tenderly. The feeling of being wanted and almost cherished left me dizzy.  
  
"Mr. Lehnsherr… what are we doing?" I asked breathless once he pulled away.  
  
"Call me Erik."  
  
"Okay. Erik…" I smiled as I said his name for the first time. It felt like it belonged on my lips. So right…  
  
"We… are going out."  
  
"Out?" I was surprised and a little disappointed. I guess I was expecting some kind of a sex marathon he had in mind to cure me from my shameful past. So disappointing in the face of what happened last night.  
  
"We'll take your car." Another strange thing, but I was much more interested in where we were going.  
  
"Okay. But can you tell me where are we going?" Before I knew he was grabbing a long coat and [glasses](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/117857639987/chapter-8) from the wardrobe in the hall. Glasses? At night?  
  
"I could. But I won't. You'll just have to trust me every step of the way." He gave me that I'm-pleased-with-myself-smile I loved so much so I forgot all about his mysterious sayings and just let myself be in his arms. Literally. He took my hand and led us to my car.  
  
I felt a little uncomfortable that he was going to drive my crappy car but then again I didn't know where we were going, so...  
  
I shifted in my seat. From the corner of my eye, I saw Erik glance at me. I turned to capture his gaze.

"Are you nervous?" he asked.

"Should I be?"

"A few days ago, I would've said probably a little. But now… No."  
  
"O-okay."  
  
"Relax. You're over thinking this."  
  
"I'm not."  
  
"Yes. You are. But I know what I'm doing. Trust me."

  
***

  
We got to some building when he parked and cut the engine. Is this it? We were going dancing at some club?  
  
He exited the car and came to open the door for me. But then he led us to some back doors at the end of the building. I'm not even sure if that's part of the club.  
  
It seemed like only established and thoroughly vetted members were permitted through the subtly secured front doors. While it appeared we are able to walk right in, I looked around to find barely visible cameras on us, as well as the eyes of several seemingly casual observers who may actually be high-end bouncers. They are in place to ensure that the "club" remains exclusive and discreet. Or that's just me being paranoid.  
  
We finally got in and it was a club after all. If he wanted to take me dancing why didn't he say so-  
  
"I want you to wait here. I just need to talk to someone and I'll come to get you. I won't be long. Don't talk to anyone. I'll get you a drink and you won't accept others. _When_ someone comes to you just tell them you're with someone and you'll be fine. Understood?"  
  
"Y-yes."  
  
Erik walked away from me, still wearing his glasses. Like he was hiding. Was he embarrassed that he was with me?  
  
This was no ordinary club. It was a place only a few people knew. And the bar Erik left me at, and the whole room only looked like it was the hallway of the whole club. At each side of the club room, there are three doors - one left, one right and one straight ahead.  
  
"Hello there." A handsome tall man approached me, a wide smile crossing his face.

"Hi-" Damn it, Erik told me not to speak to anyone. But I got distracted by the hot man who was checking me out right now.

"What’s your name, love?"

"Um. Charles."

"Charles. Pretty name. Pretty boy. I’m David. Everyone calls me Day. Everyone but you. You call me _sir_." He winked at me and I nearly hit my knees from the erotic power of that wink.

"O-okay. I mean, yes, sir."

"Did Remy bring you? You seem new, you must be here for training."

I didn’t know who that was, or what he was talking about. "I- um-"

"God, I love that man. He always brings the best. What are you into, gorgeous?"

I had no idea what that question meant.

"Everything?" I question-answered. Seemed a safe bet.

He laughed, it was a rich and warm sound. He had a rugged handsomeness, sandy blond hair which was slicked back. He looked about thirty years old, and had a wicked gleam in his eyes. He was so hot... My mouth had gone dry talking to him, so I licked my lips in nervousness.

"Very good answer." Suddenly he brought his mouth down on mine and I froze. The potency of the kiss soon overpowered my fear and I found myself kissing him back. It was slow and way too short. He pulled away.

"Let's go." He gestured with his gaze to the other doors across the hall.

"I'm- I- with someone."

His blond brows furrowed, he seemed disappointed.

"As in with 'with' someone?"

"Yes."

"Then I must apologize." He took my hand in his and brought it to his mouth to kiss it. I didn't expect him to back off so quickly. "Whoever has you is a very lucky person, tell them to keep you on a stronger leash." He winked once again and I smiled.

"Have a good night, Charles."

"Thank you."

I just kissed a stranger! And enjoyed it!? What is wrong with me? I shook off that thought and my gaze went back to the many doors where people kept going in and out. So this really wasn't the only part of the club. I saw Erik in the distance, coming back from one of them, with a man with shoulder length hair, I couldn't see his face, but his posture and everything was glad to see Erik. And I just stood there in front of the elegant bar, beneath the elegant chandelier, inside the elegant club, waiting…  
  
Erik gave the keys to my car to that man and made his way back to me.  
  
"You okay?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Alright. Come with me." He took my hand and led me through the crowd. We found ourselves entering through a door and into another part of the club. I got only a glimpse of the bar and the walls but Erik was walking beside me like he was shielding me with his body, and I couldn't even look around here before he urged me up stairs into another hallway. He closed the insulated door behind us; the low tones of conversation, and the music from the floor below were all immediately deadened.  
  
He squeezed my hand and led me slowly forward. Doors lined the corridor ahead, the first of which was closed.  
  
And that's when I heard a moan coming from one of them.  
  
"What is this place?" I stopped dead in my tracks and asked.  
  
"It's a place where you can have anything you want. Where anything you desire is not only acceptable, but attainable," he said, like it was the most obvious thing.

He led me forward to the next door which was open. He slid his hand over my hip to bring me to a stop and then moved in to stand behind me. I looked over my shoulder and I saw the man and woman inside.

The room was windowless and dominated by an enormous mattress draped in black. There was a woman lying atop it, spread eagle. Around her wrists and ankles were black leather cuffs attached to chains which were anchored to the floor. There were candles dripping with thick rivulets of hot wax placed all around the bed. They've been used on her, as I can see by the streaks of dried, blood-red wax on her stomach, thighs and breasts! Kneeling on the bed, with his head between her legs, was a man.

"Some people like to be watched," Erik whispered into my ear before pressing his lips to my neck. As if triggered by his words, the woman on the bed turned her head to look at us, then the man, who looked at me and smiled.

I gasped softly when the man's lips curved into a satisfied smile. The woman's moaning became louder and she twisted against her restraints. The man between her legs moved his arm, pushing something he's holding in his hand deep inside her, in and out. Her next moan was partly a laugh as she arched her back and threw her head back in ecstasy.

Erik turned me away from the room, back toward the hall and all its doorways, and we walked to the next one. Inside it was a young man, bound and gagged, on all fours in the center of a bare floor. Behind him was a strong muscular man, gripping his hip with one hand and slapping his bright pink ass with the other as he thrusts into him. The boy moaned and grunted behind his gag.

"Others like to be spanked," Erik explained and I was breathing heavier. I was so aroused my breaths were coming harsh. My eyes were heavy lidded as I watched the erotic pictures Erik showed me.

But then he moved me on to the next door. "It's impossible to know what you like until you try… everything."

My heart is beating so loudly I can barely hear him. But I can hear enough.  
  
He’s so close I can feel heat radiating from his body, warming my entire behind. It pulls me to him, drawing me in. Drawing me closer.

We passed three more doors, each one making me harder and harder, thinking of Erik and me in the various positions. Me bound and completely under his control. And loving it. Giving me orgasm after orgasm as he works my body in ways I never even imagined he could.

When we reached the last set of rooms, two of them were empty. One has a bed with smooth, clean, black sheets. The second is a smaller room with hooks on the wall and floor, as well as chains suspended from the ceiling. Oh god…

"I can easily picture you here. Against the wall. Facing away. Chained and unable to move. Your skin coated in a fine sheen of sweat. And me. Behind you. Pumping into you. My fingers biting into you flesh. Your moans filling the air. Your body squeezing around mine." He kept whispering in my ear from behind me, making me strain my pants. That's it, he will make me come without even touching me.

"Let me show you how good I can make you feel," he said, moving around in front of me, tugging me with him as he backed into the room.

But I stopped. My chest was rising and falling quickly with my accelerated breathing. And suddenly there's a little terror inside me. A tremor on my lower lip. He saw it all.

"I won’t hurt you, Charles," he pledged quietly, stepping closer to me, reaching up to take my chin between his fingers. I trembled in his grasp.  
  
"This is all about pleasure, pleasure you've never known before, pleasure I want to introduce you to. A little fear can heighten the senses; a little pain can feel like ecstasy. Would you like me to show you?"

I fell silent, unable to speak. I was in… Emotional pain. And with it came tears.

"Charles-"

"I want to go," I said so softly I'm sure he could barely hear me.

"I'm-"

"Please, Erik," I pleaded, my voice quivering with barely suppressed distress.

"Take me home. Right. Now."

"Okay," he said immediately. "We'll go home. There's no reason for you to be upset. I-"

"No, not we. Me. I want to go to my house. Alone. I'll get my car tomorrow."  
  
I saw a frown settle over his forehead. "Charles, I-"

I heard him begin to apologize and explain, but I was already turning and heading for the door. I was practically running down the hall toward the exit. He reached me before I could yank open the door.

"Charles, stop!" he hissed quietly. "I'll take you home. Just calm down. Don’t forget that we aren’t alone."

I tried to steady my breathing and he led me quickly through the same door, shielding me again with his body, but this time I saw the room we passed earlier. There were people half naked, with collars, staying at someone's feet, kissing, even having sex in front of everyone and enjoying it.  
  
My head was spinning, but Erik supported me and led me quickly outside. I got into my car and I saw a huge bag on the backseat. That man Erik was talking to must have brought it, but I couldn't ask what it was right now. I was too confused.  
  
"I thought you wanted to help me." Anger and hurt oozing from my tone. "But you don’t want to help me. All you want is a toy. A sick, twisted sexual toy to play with in your little clubhouse. Why did I ever trust you?" I cried, my voice breaking on the last word.

"None of that is true, Charles!" His tone was harsh. And honest. "I just want to unlock the door for you. To set you free." He reached out and brushed my tears away. "I would never ever hurt you. Do you understand that? I just want to show you things, things that will set your insides on fire. But we burn together. It's never about harming anyone. It's about pleasure. It's all about pleasure."

I'm silent. I don't know what to say. I'm so embarrassed that I wanted all of those things with him. That he made me want them all over again. Like I've wanted them since I was a teenager.

He started the car and spoke again on the ride home.

"The moment I saw you that night, dripping wet in my house, when you spoke with that soft voice of yours and then looked at me - I knew exactly who you'd become. Lust, fear, wonder, joy - such joy… I knew what you needed. Someone to take charge of you. To dominate you. I knew how you'd like it. And I knew how badly I wanted you, but I thought I could resist… Turns out I couldn't. But mark my words, Charles - you will become this even if I'm not in the picture. This is not sickness. It's not something to be ashamed about. How many boyfriends have you had before?"

"I- I don't know."  
  
"Then I take it there were more than two." Yeah, that would be a lot more than two. "You've been the one to break it off with them?"  
  
"Yes." I tried to date men my age or only few years older than me. I didn't want to be with someone much older than me like my first experience. And now there's Erik, who makes age difference not to matter at all to me anymore.  
  
"Something wasn't good?"  
  
"No, they were just fine guys. I guess I'm not a boyfriend material."  
  
"Wrong. There was something not enough. Something missing and I could show you exactly what it is, because you don't know. Vanilla boyfriends are not for you. I look at you and you're so goddamn innocent, it almost physically hurts me from hunger. Innocence has its virtues, but ignorance has none. To let a beautiful boy like you walk away from the world you belong to without ever having tasted the pleasure it offers is more than a crime. It's a sin. A shame. And I can't allow it."

"Erik, stop the car."  
  
"We're in the middle of nowhere. I won't force you to do something you don't want. That was never my intention. I'll take you home-"  
  
"Just stop the car!"  
  
And he really did. He pulled over, stopped the car and turned to me, confused. That's when I closed the distance between us and captured his lips. I felt his surprise, his tongue darting out tentatively to taste my own. I wasn't afraid of him. Only of my desires, which he spoke about like they are the most normal thing. He looked at me like I was beautiful and amazing.  
  
"Show me," I whispered in his lips.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
"Yes. I trust you," I whispered again and his lips twitched with satisfaction. He deepened the kiss, before breaking away, just to trail open-mouthed kisses to my ear, where he nuzzled along the edge before biting lightly at the lobe. "You're perfect."  
  
"Erik?" I gasped.  
  
"Yes?" His lips were too distracting so I had to pull away from him if I wanted to tell him why I ran away.  
  
"I'm sorry for the way I acted. That I ran away. I was just… ashamed. Of myself." I swallowed my fear and pushed on. "I was upset because I loved it so much. Because I imagined all of those people were you and me and it felt so good. Because it was so dirty and then there was this stranger too-  
  
"What stranger?!" He almost hissed the words, his grip on the steering wheel tightening, his eyes all wild and possessive, burning into mine.  
  
"I- I- nothing happened. I mean- What I was trying to say is - what you showed me, it was hot and it was wonderful, and it's everything I've always been afraid to be. It’s difficult for me to believe someone actually wants to see me that way. But when I stop being afraid, I know it’s okay, because it’s you." I opened my eyes and looked over at Erik, more vulnerable than I'd ever felt in my life. "I feel safe with you."  
  
"You are safe with me. I'm glad to hear you understand that."  
  
"I feel like you understand me."  
  
"I do. There's nothing to be ashamed of. There are a lot of people like us. And they would kill for someone like you. You are a prize, Charles. A crown, a work of art, a priceless jewel that will inspire the urge to own you in any man who looks at you. You should be owned, cherished and guarded. If I owned you, I would guard you with my life."  
  
I leaned shyly to Erik's face, shut my eyes, and kissed him softly on the mouth.  
  
Erik kissed me back, not very softly. I felt the desire, the anticipation in his kiss of how happy he was with everything he heard from me.

His lips are firm yet yielding, this kiss is different. There's promise in it, the promise that this is where the ride starts, that this is where I have to take a deep breath and really jump into the unknown.

His mouth teased mine until it opened fully and he slid his tongue inside. As it tangled with mine, stroking it, licking it, his hands skated down my back. He angled his head and deepened the kiss. I’m caught up in sensation as his palms covered my butt and then slid down the backs of my thighs to pull me into his lap. My car is too small for these kind of activities, but it couldn't stop us.

Heat exploded between us. An urgency flourished between us, making lips hungry and hands desperate. Suddenly, none of this feels too soon or too rushed or too dangerous. It feels just _right_.

Out of breath, Erik dragged his mouth away from mine, trailing it to my ear, where he nips at the lobe. "God, the noises you make could make a man come in his pants," he groaned. Chills shot down my back. "I'm going to make you mine tonight. You’ll be mine, Charles. Even if it's just for tonight, you will be mine."

With his words ringing in my head, he crushed his lips against mine again, threading the fingers of one hand into my hair as his other hand pressed my hips against his.

"You're so beautiful… you should spend your days and nights naked tied to a man's bed, gagged and blindfolded with your body waiting to be used." _Jesus!_ He let out a shuddering breath saying this, and I moaned with him, picturing all this.

"Get back in your seat before I take you right here." I gasped and leaned to kiss him again, showing him I was ready, for him to fuck me in my car, with the danger of someone seeing us. "No, Charles, you'll have to wait till we're home," he said sternly, and how could I not do as he says.

I sat back in my seat, trying to cover my hard on with my hands and steady my breathing.

"Okay. So… what's in the bag?" I asked, feeling my mouth crooking in a little smile, which caused Erik to relax too and grin back at me.  
  
"My gear."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so it begins xD


	9. Chapter 9

Once we got inside the house, we were immediately at each other. I miss Pietro already but I was glad we had the place only for ourselves.

I still had a little bit of panic, but it was subsiding quickly under my lust. Erik's fingers shifted against my ass as I was slowly undoing all the buttons to his shirt.

"Charles," Erik whispered when we came up for air. He pressed his forehead against mine and ran his hands down my back.

I kept my eyes shut and nuzzled him back. "Show me," I whispered. "Please."  
  
In answer Erik kissed me hard and deep again, and I felt the last of my tension leave.

"We should take it slow. Easy," Erik whispered, but his voice was rough.

"I don't want easy," I replied shyly, but eager. I nipped gently at Erik's ear. "I want you," I whispered.

Now that I made the decision to give in to Erik, I didn't see any reason not to sin as big as I liked. I mean, if you're gonna steal a chicken, eat the whole damn thing.

Without breaking the kiss, he pressed me against a wall. Erik's one hand was still anchored in my hair. The other stroked down my spine in a heavy caress until it reached to squeeze my ass again. There, the greedy digits worked my flesh, dividing their time between stroking down the crack of my ass and kneading my cheeks.  
  
Until he pulled away.  
  
"We need to talk first." I wasn't in the mood for talking so I licked my way back up to Erik's panting lips. "Please Charles."

  
***

"So is this the part where you give me some kind of contract I have to sign? With things I like, without even trying them?"  
  
He looked at me and laughed, his eyes were laughing with him too. He was just as happy that we were going to do this, as much as I was. I felt like I was flying. More than flying. It was like some crazy vibration, some wild beat within my body that kept me smiling, kept my feet from ever touching the ground. I wanted to stand here with him all night, just to feel his fingertips on my cheek, his lips on my lips-

"No. That is ridiculous. What kind of things have you heard of our world?"  
  
"I just… I didn't know your world really existed. I thought it only happened in books and movies."  
  
"You won't sign any contract. Don't worry. A Dominant really has to know what their Submissive wants. However I'll go easy on you tonight, and as much as I think I know what you want me to give you, I'll do a checklist where I'll get an idea of what you may like and what you may not." My heart began the slow plunge to my stomach. I nodded my head in understanding. He sensed that I was nervous of what's coming - admitting what I'd like… So he came closer to me, his eyes locking on mine, his hand cupping my face, before speaking softly. "Don't worry. It's only to prevent my beautiful subby from having a freak-out in the middle of a scene. So don't be afraid."

"Okay." I chuckled at him calling me 'his beautiful subby'.

"Let's sit down." He led me to the couch and we sat close to each other. I was almost in his lap once he put his arm around me and pulled me to him.

"I'll use a one-to-five scale - one meaning it turns you on as much as kissing your grandmother and five meaning it makes you spray your pants just thinking about it. Doesn't matter if you've done it or not - just if you want to do it. First category - sex."

"Five," I answered.

He grinned at me. "That was just the category. But I like your enthusiasm, little one." I blushed furiously.

"Little one?" I asked about the sweet name he called me, biting my lip from grinning up at him.

"As beautiful as your name is, it's too formal for when we're together. I love little things like you, and you're mine tonight. I don't like being formal when I'm in charge, you're even lucky I'm still wearing my shirt." I chuckled.

"So it's something like a pet name?"

"Exactly like a pet name."

"I like it." He smiled slowly.

"Category one," Erik continued, "on a scale of one to five… Oral sex?"

"Five."

"Agreed."

Erik looked at me before dropping his eyes to his notes again.

"Anal sex?"

"Five."

"Multiple partners?"

I looked down at my hands. Then back at Erik, whose eyes were searching into mine. Then suddenly I realized the checklist was just a pretence, Erik didn't need it, he was just looking at my reactions, the way my body heated up, and he knew immediately what I'd like.

"Five."

"Threesomes?" Oh god, I've never tried it, but I've always found it sexy. I blushed and turned my head away. I didn't need anyone else if I had Erik, I didn't want him to think that but I- it would be nice to try something like that-

"I take it that's five. You really are perfect, Charles." He was smiling widely at me. And then I realized. He wasn't mocking me. He was enjoying me.

  
***

  
The questioning continued for some time. Most of the things from the other categories he asked about I had no idea what they were, but he said he had just the right things for my masochistic side, so he finally showed me his 'gear'.  
  
"Let me introduce you. This," he said as he lifted the first object, "is a basic flogger. Six-inch handle, eighteen-inch suede thongs. Feel?"

I reached out and ran my fingers over the flogger thing. The suede felt so soft to the touch.

"Used lightly," Erik explained, "it will feeling like a tickling sort of massage. Used with full force, however, the impact on your back will knock the breath out of you. Tricky thing. I could beat you with this until you cried and within the hour it would appear as if no one had laid a finger on you."

He laid the flogger back on the table.

"And this… do you know what this is?" he lifted another object, this one similar to the flogger but more sinister looking.

"N-no," I answered, feeling stupid.

"Don't worry, this is why I'm showing you each one of them, so you'll know what they are and what they could do to you." He pecked my lips affectionately and continued. "It's a cat-o'-nine-tails. This is a lighter variation of the kind used to discipline sailors in the British Navy. Even this lighter version could break your skin if I wanted it to. But if I use it on you correctly, you'll have the loveliest freckle bruises on you tomorrow courtesy of these little knots on the ends of the cords. Here," he said, handing it to me.

I accepted it with almost trembling hands. I touched the knots, hefted its deceptively light weight.

"You know, there was an even smaller version of this that was used on the cabin boys aboard ship," he said with laughter in his voice. "Guess what it was called?"

"I don't know."

"A boy's pussy," he said, grinning wickedly. He took the cat back from me.

"A riding crop of course. Tawse," he said, naming the heavy leather strap that lay next to the flogger.

"Used to discipline schoolchildren in the nineteenth century. It won't break the skin but it will burn like fire. And this," he said sliding one more object off the table, "is exactly what it looks like."

"A stick?"

"You're adorable and I really want to beat you for that answer. A cane, little one. Rattan cane, ten millimeters thick, seventy-six centimeters long. So painful that its use on prisoners has been condemned by the United Nations. It can not only permanently scar a person but permanently disable them as well. Even used lightly on the buttocks or thighs, the pain will be so intense that you will choke on it. Traditionally six strokes are delivered at a time; five horizontal and one diagonal. That is called barring the gate."

He stepped back and with astonishing expertise twirled the cane in his fingers like a baton. I could hear the hissing sound as the reedy wood sliced through the air.

"Now… Choose."

"Choose?" I asked, unable to take my eyes off the dozen or so various kinds of floggers, whips and canes on the table.

"Yes. Pick one. Whatever you pick I will use on you tonight. So think about it carefully."

_I could beat you with this until you cried._

_Loveliest freckle bruises._

_It will burn like fire._

_You will choke on it._

"This one," I said, picking up the cat-o'-nine-tails. Erik took it from me. My pulse quickened as he twined the lashes through his fingers.

"Little one," he said as he gripped the thongs and pulled them taut. "This will hurt you. Badly."

"I want you to hurt me."

He raised his eyebrow at me and smiled, pleased with my answer.

"You have no idea how happy you make me, but-"

"I can take it," I said.

"But do you want to take it? Will you always?"

"I want to, more than anything. From you - always."

He brought his mouth down onto my lips, still standing before me. I arched into his touch as his arms went around me and pleasure spiked deep inside me. More, more, more, I wanted to beg. His tongue teased me. His fingers toyed with me.

"For you, pain is the prelude," he said into my lips.

"Prelude to what?"

"The reward."

"What is the pain to you?"

"Its own reward."

***

I thought we were going to bed finally; instead we went to his study. He put on music and poured me some wine.  
  
I sat on the piano bench and he came to sit next to me. I knew what he was doing, he was trying to make me relax. What he didn't know is I've been waiting for this since forever.  
  
"A toast." He raised his glass, and I smiled. "A man has been brought to his knees tonight, and will never be the same again," he said proudly and our glasses clicked together. I chuckled and asked, "Was it necessary to have an entire toast for me?"

"I wasn't talking about you, little one."  
  
Oh. I smiled as widely as him and he leaned down to capture my lips. And we kissed again, kissed through our smiles.  
  
The Ninth Symphony, Fourth Movement. Otherwise known as the 'Ode to Joy' by the great Beethoven was playing, but I've never felt it the way I was feeling it right now. At five minutes and seven seconds the world turned into music. It erupted around me, went off like a bomb that showered joy and happiness all around me. The sounds were more beautiful than I'd ever noticed them before.  
  
"If only Beethoven had written a piano part for his Ninth Symphony, my life would be complete," I said.  
  
"Yes. It's a shame really. But I think Beethoven simply felt the other instruments would be overpowered by the piano. It's a large instrument. Some people find it intimidating."  
  
He winked at me and I laughed, grinning up at him.  
  
"It's beautiful," I whispered.  
  
"You're beautiful. I never appreciated the Ninth Symphony until I met you, Charles. When I saw you I heard it for the first time coming from inside my own heart. Have you ever had a dream feel so real that upon waking you thought you were still asleep?" He took my hand in his and I nodded. "Yes."  
  
"I felt like that the moment I saw you, little one. I dreamed you once. I think I'm still dreaming. Many years ago I first dreamed of you. A friend of mine… and I were talking, fantasizing about the perfect partner. Only a dream… and then you." My heart overflowed with joy upon hearing those words.  
  
He closed the fallboard of the piano and looked at me.  
  
"Are you nervous?" I asked.  
  
He exhaled heavily. "I haven't done this in a long time."  
  
"So you are nervous?"  
  
"Not at all."  
  
"Me neither," I said, and meant it.  
  
His hand slid to my back and he pulled me into his lap. I straddled his thighs on the bench as he scored my back with his fingers. My head fell back and I was almost laying on the piano as he kissed my neck, my throat. His teeth found the tendon where my shoulder met my neck. He bit down hard, hard enough that I gasped, and he shuddered in my arms.  
  
"Stay," he said as he put me back on the bench and disappeared from the room.  
  
I waited there as ordered. I want this. From now until the end of time, everything to be like this - Erik giving orders and me taking them. I would wait when he said wait and where he said wait and I would not move until he told me I could move.  
  
He returned to me and I couldn't contain my smile. He came closer and handed me a paper.  
  
"That says I'm clean. It's less than six months old and I haven't had sex in a year. I don't want anything between us, I intend to make you entirely mine tonight."  
  
I couldn't believe my ears, I just gaped at him.  
  
"But last night-"  
  
"Yes. It's been so long…"  
  
I bit my lower lip from absolute happiness. He kneeled before me and I asked shyly.  
  
"Last night… Did it feel…" I paused and asked the question I really wanted to ask. "How did I feel?"  
  
"There's not a word that's been invented to describe how you feel inside, little one."  
  
I gasped and suddenly he wrapped my legs behind his back. He lifted me easily off the bench and carried me to his room.  
  
His bed was massive. Dark covers, maroon sheets, the color combination is very… manly.  
  
His hands started to move on me, and he kissed me again as he carried me across the room toward the bed. All thoughts of my mother, the things I was ashamed of, and anything that wasn't Erik making love to me sailed away as I sank into the mattress, opening my mouth, my legs, my body and took Erik all the way into my soul.  
  
[Strong arms](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/118362136862) embraced me and pulled me up close. Erik slid his hand into my hair and held my mouth in place, devouring me in a slow, primal kiss. I felt like the room had dissolved away, the level of energy and intensity radiating off him engulfing me. I returned the kiss with a needy hunger of my own.  
  
The shame and fear from earlier melted away, replaced with raw, blinding need. Need to be held, need to be touched by someone who wanted to give pleasure, as well as receive it. I needed this moment.

My lips were trembling as Erik increased the pressure of the kiss, sliding the tip of his tongue across my lower lip. Tentative, he sucked on the moist, plump flesh of my lips, raking his teeth lightly over its sensitive lining.  
  
I lay there, still, as he unbuttoned his shirt. Far rougher than necessary, he grasped the fabric of my clothes and pulled them down and off my body.

With his knees he pushed my thighs apart. When I raised my hands to touch his naked chest, he captured them and pinned them above my head. He put his full weight into holding me down.  
  
"Call me sir," he ordered.  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"Tell me I own you."  
  
"You own me, sir."  
  
"Say I am the only one you will ever obey."  
  
"I will obey you only, sir."  
  
We spoke the words - call and response - like the most sacred vows.  
  
"Tell me what your safe word will be, little one. You do know what a safe word is, right?"

"Yes."  
  
"Okay. Tell me. I'll make sure you never need to use it, but I still need to know it."  
  
"I- ugh- _Beauty_."  
  
" _Beauty_ as in _The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty_?"

"Yes."  
  
"Very good, little sub. At any time you can tell me if you need to stop. Tell me what you need and your request will be honored. Say your safe word only when and if you need me to stop everything. You give yourself freely to me. I would never force it on you."  
  
"I know, sir. All I want is to please you tonight."  
  
"You will. You already have."  
  
Even naked he still seemed clothed with dignity and strength, and he wore his strength like a shield. With his body, he covered mine. His thighs felt like marble against my thighs. His skin shone like polished gold. His lips tasted as sweet as the wine and I drank deep of him.  
  
He reached down into the bag beside the bed and pulled out black rope.

"Do you want to be completely under my mercy tonight, little one?"

"Oh god, more than anything!" I gasped enthusiastically, eyeing the rope, already imagining Erik tying me. But he glared at me.

"I-I mean yes, sir." Finally he gave me a pleased smile and took my wrists in his hands. He kissed them softly and then started working the rope around my wrists.

"Are you afraid, little one?" He brought my hands over my head and started tying them to the bedpost.

"No..."

"You need to relax, or your hands will hurt a lot tomorrow. Relax your muscles," he said soothingly but I stiffened even more when I felt like I wasn't doing it right.

"I'm going to tell you another story."

"Okay. Is it a love story?" I asked, smiling, feeling my body already relax a little beneath his.

"Yes. Once upon a time," he began, as he worked the knots on my wrists, binding me to the bed, "there was a beautiful young man named with the beautiful name Charles. He reminds me of a dove… All white and light and nervous." I smiled shyly as he looked down at me.

"And he had the most beautiful eyes I'd ever seen. The strangest color of blue - like a spring morning so bright it hurts to look at it." I giggled like a cheerleader talking to the star quarterback.

"But Charles had secrets he wanted to keep. Charles hid who he was for his entire life. He was ashamed and feared someone would see him and judge him for it. Then one night… he met a man and he saw what Charles was."  
  
After binding me completely to the bed, he stared down at my helpless body.  
  
"What was he?" I asked.

He kissed the top of my head and whispered,

"He was mine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh we finally got there xD  
> Some descriptions by T. Reisz.  
> Sorry for all the wait, but put yourself in Charles' place xD


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've got some POVs switching here :))

_"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Resist it, and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself…"_  
_-Oscar Wilde_

***

_**Charles** _

He's already shown me what he likes, what he can _be_ like. And I find it… more than exciting. I remember his words, the things he promised he'd do to me, things he promised he'd make me feel. And I don't doubt I'll feel them all.

Anticipation bloomed in my stomach and I'm ready.

"I want you to hurt me," I said. "As much as you want, sir." A strange urge and need to please him overflowed in me.

"You say that, but you don't mean it."

"I mean it."

Suddenly his hand slapped my ass. So hard it made me yelp in pain. He raised his other hand to my cheek and with the same hand he managed to make my ass cheek burn with, stroked the spot gently.

"Now do you still want me to hurt you as much as I want?" he asked. It was like he was saying: _This is me. Take me or leave me._

I took him.  
  
"Yes. You don't have to be careful with me, sir."  
  
"You are my most precious possession. I will guard you with my life." He kissed me with rough possession, sealing the words.  
  
I'd read about passion, about hunger, about desire, and had felt some of them. But never had I tasted them in my own mouth. I struggled in my restraints to reach out and touch him. It arouses me that I'm bound and helpless in Erik's arms.  
  
"You're pulling too much, little one. It will hurt tomorrow-"

"I don't care."  
  
"Let me try something else." He untied my wrists expertly.  
  
He pulled a set of white leather cuffs from the bag. They looked beautiful. He came back to me and took my right hand. He pressed my palm to the center of his chest as he locked the cuff around my wrist. He did the same to my left wrist. I marveled at the sight of my hands in the cuffs. How did all of this feel so right?  
  
"You have very gentle skin, this will be more merciful on it."  
  
"I like them."  
  
"I can see." He smirked.

He weaved the rope through the buckles on my cuffs. He turned me toward the bedpost and secured my arms high over my head. I stretched out, breathing into the position, feeling exposed from my ankles to my neck. I couldn't move my hands, couldn't run away. Leaving him was no longer a choice. I couldn't if I wanted to. And I never wanted to.

He ran his hands over my naked body. "So smooth… Such flawless skin. I ache to leave it covered in welts and bites."  
  
"Oh god… Will you kiss me again?" I asked, already craving his lips to be back on mine. Not a humble request, merely a question.

"When you've earned it."

"Let me earn it then."

"So eager… I love it. You will. We've got the house only to ourselves tonight. How loud do you think you'll scream when I fuck you?" I moaned in response.

"I know you can do louder."

He yanked my legs apart, opening me until I felt myself gape. He tickled at the crease of my ass, teasing at my hole. Then he hauled back and slapped it.

The sound rang out in the room, and I cried out as he slapped me again and again. The pain shot through me but the pleasure did too, until I was bucking and moaning as I turned over my shoulder to watch Erik spank my tender hole. When I tensed, he jammed his finger deep, caught my mouth and kissed me hard.

Erik pulled away and I felt him shifting on the bed behind me.

He took something from the bag and then it began.

The first blow of the flogger landed between my shoulder blades. My back burned in pain. I almost laughed from the shock of it.

He struck me again. Breath exploded from my lungs. Then again and again the flogger landed, sometimes in the same spot over and over again until tears filled my eyes. I could never guess where the next blow would fall. I stopped trying to guess. I didn't even care anymore. I just let myself feel. And I've never felt anything like this before. It stung, and my skin burned like fire. More, I wanted. _More._ Let him burn me to the ground. Let me rise again from the ashes.

It hurt, but so did everything that mattered. Love hurt, life hurt, birth hurt, changing hurt, growing hurt. I had never felt so alive.

I strained against my bonds with a terrible sort of pleasure.

My moans mixed with the ones from pain and my cock was leaking on the sheets. I needed to be touched and I would come harder than ever.

Erik had become the master of my body. Tied up like this I couldn't give myself pleasure, or any sort of release or relief. All sensation came from him and him alone. That's the beauty of it all.

The flogging ceased and Erik pressed his chest into my bare back. I cried out as his heat scalded my raw skin.

"Too much?" He slid his hands up in my hair. I groaned in pleasure.

"No, sir."

"You want more pain?"

"I want all the pain you want to give me, sir. Everything. I want everything from you."

I struggled in my restraints, arching my back and thrusting my ass into the air. "Please."

With my arms tied to the bedpost I could only see in front of me. I heard Erik pulling something else from his bag. I couldn't see it, but I could guess from the sound of the air being sliced in two.

It's the riding crop. I felt the leather end of it gently brushing my back, going lower and lower, until it reached my buttocks. I pushed back against it and Erik slid it between the crack of my ass. I moaned so loudly but I heard Erik gasp in pleasure with me.

I heard clearly his ragged breathing, the slightest catch of his breath, the subtlest moan in the back of his throat. Had there ever been a more beautiful sound than this - the sound of the pleasure Erik took in me?

Suddenly it made contact with the back of my thighs and I screamed. I didn't mean to be so loud, but the pain and arousal pushed the sound out of me. He paused for a second but I was too quick to break the silence.

"Oh my god, please more, sir!" I'd never been this intensely aroused in my life.

He struck me again.

A third time.

A fourth.

Something brushed my ass, and I startled. When I realized it was a cold finger full of lube, I shifted and opened for Erik in anticipation of what was to come. He nipped at my shoulder and hip, and I, wordless and half-hypnotized, lifted my ass more into the air as I pressed my face into the pillow, my hands above my head, holding onto the bondage. I felt nothing but pleasure as he probed me with two fingers, moving in and out of me slowly, pushing deep into all my hidden places.

He impaled me, invaded me, took ownership of me with every controlled yet merciless thrust of his fingers. All four of them.

With one hand still inside me, the other struck me a fifth time, but I couldn't tell with what, because I came hard, so hard that I blacked out for a second. Screaming loudly I collapsed fully on the bed, pulse racing, ass convulsing around Erik's fingers still exploring the end of my orgasm.

Before I knew it Erik was reaching up in a hurry and unknotting the ropes. He turned me around, I was drained and boneless in his arms. Shining dots of light sparkled on the outer edge of my vision, and in the center is Erik's face full of worry.

"W-what d-did you just do to me?" I asked, shuddering. Tears still streaming down my face, which was surely all bewilderment.

He cupped my face quickly, his gaze full of questions, all worried and panicked.

"Did I hurt you too much? Did you not like it? Wha-"

"I came," I said quietly, still shocked, still feeling the pleasure of my orgasm, of my burning skin.

His expression immediately went from absolute panic to one of real pleasure.

"Welcome to this world, little one." Watching me with tender satisfaction his hand gently took my jaw, and he kissed me slowly, running his fingers through my wet hair soothingly. "You were so good, little one. You did so good. You're perfect. I'm so proud of you. So proud…" I listened as if I was in delirium. But all those praises just made me hard all over again. "Let's rest now." He moved to lay beside me but I said quite clearly,

"No."

"No?"

"I w-want- You're hard." He chuckled.

"Yes, I am. You can't blame me, you should have seen yourself. I've never seen anything sexier in my life. Don't worry about me. I've waited for you all my life, I can wait another hour, or day. You need to rest."

"I want more."

"I'll give you more later-"

"Please, sir. I need you now," I whispered as sultrily as I could and captured his mouth. For the first time I initiated our kiss; suddenly I felt sexy and a little more confident than I had ever been.

"Please …" I begged and Erik pressed his forehead to mine. "Please …"

"You do beg beautifully."

"I'll beg more if you want me to."

"You'll beg for mercy when I'm inside you."

"I don't want mercy. I want you."

He leaned down to capture my mouth in a lingering passionate kiss. He kissed me the way only he has ever kissed me and I returned the kiss with equal and even greater fervency. Our tongues mingled and I drank of the wine on his lips, swallowed the heat of his mouth. I winced when he nipped my bottom lip.

Heat melted through my stomach, settling into my cock again. It didn't even soften, it just stood right up, ready to come again. How could he make me feel like that?

Do I love him? Is that it? I don't know. Whatever it is I feel for him, it's fierce. And passionate. And deep. It's different to the way I felt about anyone. A _lot_ different.

I wanted him inside me. No, not wanted, needed.

"Please, sir…" I begged for the hundredth time tonight.

"Please what?" He raised his head and cocked his eyebrow at me as if amused I would even dare beg for anything more.

"I want you."

"You have me."

"I want you inside me."

"I'm always inside you, little one." It's true. Always inside my head. Inside my heart…  
  
I sounded so desperate, and he was getting harder with every plea of mine.  
  
"Please."

"Please what?" he asked again.

"Please do something to me."

"Something dirty?"

"Yes."

"I want an explicit example."

I licked my lips hesitating to say all that's on my mind. He leaned down, his expression soft, his words a whispering encouragement.

"You can be as dirty as you like, I can be as rough as you like me to, you could be my whore and I'll worship you even more. Do you know why? Because you're not my dirty whore. You're my beautiful whore and I want you this way. We both do." Lust rose, higher and faster than the fear of my desires, with every word of his.

"I want to see you let go, be wild. Free. I want to make you forget about the rest of the world for a while. Let me…"

_It's okay to do this, to be this way, Charles. Erik likes you like this. Nothing else matters._

He kissed away my gasp and waited for me to say something.

"I want your cock- I want- you to put your cock in me. Please," I said out of breath, my voice filled with desire, hunger, desperation, greed for more of him.

"Where in you, Charles?"

I shuddered. "In my mouth."

My mouth went dry as Erik straddled me, knelt and nudged his cock past my lips. I engulfed it, moaning as I sucked, opening my throat.

When his cock slid a few times to the back of my throat I shut my eyes and sank into licking, sucking, bobbing, loving all of it, loving the feel of it on my tongue, between my lips, the tiny bits of precome I caught from the tip. I swirled my tongue, taking him deep, deeper, making a soft sound and sucking hard on Erik's shaft.

When Erik pulled my head, holding me still, I let him thrust inside me, almost choking me. Erik grunted and gasped, and then he simply fucked my mouth mercilessly, taking away my breath until he abruptly withdrew. I only went for more, my head bobbing faster now.

His chest was rising and falling rapidly - panting and grunting. His fist tightened in my hair, pulling hard enough to give just a bit of pain. And it's rewarding, encouraging, because I know I'm bringing him to the edge of his control.

"Slow down, little one," he rasped, pulling away again.

"I want you to come in my mouth." I tried to take his cock back in, which was inches from me.

"Yes, eager little sub, but I want to fuck you first. And I'm not as young as you are, I need to pace myself."

And then like something clicked inside me, unleashing all my desires, I spoke, "I want you to fuck me. I want you to make me do… things for you. I want you… to watch me. I want you to do all kinds of things to me. I want to make you proud. It makes me feel good too. Safe. I want you to come inside me-"

I stared at his face, hungry blue eyes underneath long dark eyelashes, partly open lips, hair that I ached to run my fingers through, the sheen of sweat that covered his forehead, his shoulders and the vein that pulsed visibly in his neck. It must have taken all his strength to hold back and not lose himself inside me. A year since he'd last done this. His self-control could shatter at any moment.

I wanted it to shatter.

So I whispered, "You own me."

 

***

  
_**Erik**_

  
Those crystal blue eyes, full of lust, were watching me intently, those quick-smiling pink lips were panting so erotic for me.

" _You own me._ " He whispered the three most beautiful words and I saw it in his eyes that he meant them.

I lost it.

Without warning I shoved two fingers into him, as deep as I could go.

Charles' back arched hard off the bed, his pucker clenching around my fingers.

Without mercy, I pulled back and shoved in again, even deeper. His body opened to me more and I pushed in a third finger. All the lube I put on coated my hand and he let out a groan in the back of his throat.

Another minute would be a minute too much for me. I pulled my hand out, grabbed him by the hips and pulled him toward me. I wasted no time entering his beautiful body. I thrust in deep and he took every inch.

I could feel from the tension in his body that it hurt him a little, he was so tight. But I could also tell - from the moans that escaped his lips and the way he raised his hips to take even more of me - that he liked that it hurt. Just like last night, how I fucked him raw and he came violently on my cock. I won't forget that night any time soon, or ever.

"You like pain?" I whispered as I thrust again, right into the core of him.

"Yes... please..." he breathed.

"And I like seeing you like that. How perfect is that?"

All he did was moan louder, whimpering and thrashing beneath me. It was a beautiful sight. I placed my hands next to his shoulders and rode him with long, hard thrusts.

"I want to fuck every part of you," I said as the heat of him surrounded my cock, enveloped it.

"You can."

"Has anyone fucked you like this? Has anyone made it hurt?"

"No," he whispered.

"You like it?"

"Yes..."

"Has it ever felt this good?"

"Nothing feels this good," he moaned, too far gone in lust to form a coherent answer.

"Good boy… such a good boy, you take it so beautifully. I can fuck you all night like this. I think I will."

I see his pearly teeth sink into his red bottom lip and I growl like an animal.

I grasped his hips with both hands and squeezed them. His fingers caught into the fabric under him and inside him everything was squeezing me deliciously. It was too much. I almost came from that alone. With a grunt of frustration, I pulled out of Charles' body and brought my mouth down onto his leaking cock. Licking and kissing, pushing my tongue up and around him. He writhed under my mouth, twisted and groaned. I bruised his hips with my hands as I pinned him hard to the bed.

I yanked him to me and shoved my cock back inside him, impaling him hard and deep. He rewarded me with a cry of pleasure tinged with pain. His legs locked tight around me. When he slammed his hands against my chest I grabbed them, pinned them behind his back and pushed into him with a punishing thrust.

"You want this," I said, fucking him with abandon now. Every muscle in my hips had coiled into the tightest knot of need and pressure.

"Yes, God, yes," he said, as he pushed back against me to take him deeper, writhing and whimpering in my arms.

I pushed him onto his back once again and forced his legs even wider. It wasn't enough. No matter what I did I couldn't fuck him hard enough, get into him deep enough. I've never felt such raw need for anyone. I've never felt like someone was designed for me. I could never ever get enough of him.

I kissed him with a hunger I'd never knew I could feel for anyone. I found a reserve of desire, a deeper hunger, a longing to have something with him I had with no one else. I slipped my tongue inside him and the kiss turned wild and violent as the way I thrust inside him. He tasted so sweet, like warm honey.

I forced his legs around me, rose up over him and mounted him again.

"Oh my god, please..." A pledge for more. Even in my wildest dreams I've never imagined he could love it as much as he is. He wanted me to let myself go entirely with him, let myself fuck him as roughly as I wanted to. But that's never going to happen. If he was some stranger I didn't give a fuck for, I would. But I would never be able to take the risk of truly hurting Charles. The risk of losing him.

Whatever I gave him tonight, he took. And it's only his first time. 

Sensations hit me, blinding and contradictory. The insane desire, the unexplainable need, wanting to spend hours and days with the him in my arms, yet never wanting this moment to end. Needing to come so badly my dick throbs painfully, yet wanting to stay buried inside him all night.   
  
I’m totally screwed. But in this second, there’s not a goddamn thing I would change.

We were a tangle of limbs on the bed, limbs and flesh and bodies entwined so fully, joined so deeply, that it was as if we were sealed together. The heat had melted and merged us. We weren't even human now, but sex in its rawest, purest form.

He worked himself against me with hungry thrusts of his hips. He was about to come again any moment now, he was shuddering, and his inner contractions clenched me so hard they hurt me.

I rammed my own orgasm into him with a feral growl. He came with a cry as I filled him. I continued to drive into him, pouring into him endlessly as he shuddered around me and shattered beneath me.

I dug my hand into his hair at the nape of his neck and pulled, bending his body, forcing it into greater submission to mine.

His shoulders were still shaking with the force of his orgasm, his ass was still pulsing around my cock, as carnal joy wracked every nerve in his body. It went on and on, spasms of pleasure that forced whimpering gasps from his lungs.

He's the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I want to see this picture every night for the rest of my life. I felt a wave of happiness flow through me and a surge of possessiveness. _Mine_. All mine. 

We went still. His body. My body. Neither of us moved for any reason but to breathe.

I was still inside him, reluctant to leave him even though I needed to. I needed to pull out, pull away, remember who I was and what Charles means to me. I needed to give him space, time, let him recover, hug him tight, hold him in my arms.

But I was just burning with need to fuck him again.

He's perfection. Just like I've dreamed him so many times. I want him for my own. [I want him in my bed, every night like this.](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/118700673057/chapter-10)

Every second he spent under my mercy, submitting to me, allowing me to explore him both physically and emotionally, his past loosens its grip. The shame disappears. I can see it in his body language, in his smile. I see it very clearly right now. Lost in the last waves of pleasure, he doesn't even know he's doing it but he smiles tenderly with closed eyes.

He's happy.

He's free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So... yeah. I should be ashamed that even more porn is coming xD


	11. Chapter 11

The moment I saw him the first time over a month ago, I'd felt as if a golden cord had encircled me at the sight of him and tightened with each step toward him. Now I felt the cord again, tight around my hips and my heart. As he pressed deeper and deeper into me, I felt the cord lifting me, carrying me higher and higher until my heart scraped the sky.  
  
The cord broke at its apex and I crashed to earth. I came apart, crying out as my climax crashed through me.  
  
He mounted me again that night, entered me again, fucked me again. The first time might have had pretensions of lovemaking. The second time he didn't bother with any of the niceties of civilized sex. He fucked me brutally, unapologetically, he fucked me like he would never have another chance to fuck me again this side of heaven and hell, and he would make the most of it even if it killed us both.

I felt like property in his hands, owned, possessed and enslaved. I lost myself in that night, ceased to be Charles, ceased to be a person with a mind or a will of my own. I was His and _His_ became my only identity. If someone asked me who I was, "I'm His" would be the answer.

After he came a second time inside me, I was totally spent. Welts and bruises scored my body. Movement is the last thing that I registered, before being dragged into a strong embrace, surrounded by the spicy fragrance of after-sex mixed with the comforting scent of warm man. He put his arms around me and we fell asleep like that.

"Charles? Charles-" I felt a gentle shaking in my sleep, and soft whispers in my ear in the middle of the night.

"Mmyeahh?" I asked sleepily in the dark. I thought I may be dreaming I'm in Erik's bed, in his hot embrace, but I felt a little burning on my skin and I knew all that happened had been real. The best night of my life was real.

"Are you okay?" he whispered, concerned. I smiled against his chest as his hands gently brushed all over me.

"Perfect."

"Okay."

I drifted away again with a smile.

 

***

  
I loved everything about that night. The intense sex, the pain, the ownership, his arms around me, his chest under my cheek, his late-night cock deep inside me. My internal muscles clenched with remembrance and I flinched slightly with blessed soreness - the best kind of ache. I wonder if Erik liked having me here too. He enjoys "having me," that's obvious and I can't be happier, but I wonder if he'd want… more. Because me waking in his arms is the last drop for me. I want lots of nights and mornings like that.

I'm awakened by the steady brush of Erik's pelvis against my backside and an erotic whisper in my ear.

"Wake up Sleeping Beauty, open up those angel eyes for me. I want to make you scream." I groaned and his large hand slid down my stomach, squeezing my already hard cock then tracing the tip with his fingers, in a way that makes my back arch - press into his touch. His teeth scraped my shoulder, and it feels feral and dangerous.

He's not waiting for permission, but I moan it just the same. I'm his, my body is his, to do what he wants to do with it.

Then those magical fingers, already lubed up, are between my legs, sliding and spreading wetness there. He took my hand and pressed my own fingers against my cock.

His voice was gravelly with sleep as he directed, "Keep doin' that."

Hot skin pressing, lips blazing a trail up my neck to the sensitive flesh behind my ear. My breath comes in quick gasps and I grip myself harder, spiking pleasure that tightens my stomach. Erik's panting breath tickled my shoulder blade as he gripped my knee and lifted my leg.

_Yes. This. Now._

_Please now._

I didn't realize I'd spoken aloud until I felt his chuckle. "We must've been having the same dream."

And then he filled me. Fully. Perfectly. Spearing my ass with his hard, heavy thickness. My head tilted back, chin rising with an excited moan. Air escaped his lips in a long, whistling stream as he thrust slowly.

Jesus, God, I love how he moves - how he knows just the right angle, the right speed to drive me straight to the brink. I don't have to say a word, do a thing. Unless he tells me to.

"You will come all over my cock," he ordered "And then you're gonna keep coming while I fill you up. Do you understand?"

I nodded, my body already sucking at him to thrust into me.

His hand squeezed my leg harder and I reached around to the back of his thigh -the firm swell of his ass - pushing him into me deeper. Making him groan.

Erik sucked on my earlobe, his voice scraping. "Goddamn, little one, I love doing you like this. Being able to look at every inch of you. So fucking beautiful."

He plunged harder, slapping my ass loudly.

"You love it, too?" he panted.

He released my leg, but I kept it elevated - feeling too good to let it drop. Then his fingers pinched and tugged on my nipples, torturously exquisite.

"Show me," he grunts. "Show me how good it feels. How much you love it."

With a cry I pushed back into his thrust, meeting his every move. I bent forward at the waist for leverage, grinding back as he surged forward. Faster. Building. More.

"Fuck, that's it, Charles."

And we've become a pulsating, writhing mass of pleasure. Moans and gasps, clutching limbs and contracting muscles. My nails dug into the skin on his leg when I came, my mouth opened against the crisp bed sheet, screaming, fireworks detonating behind my eyelids to rain fire through my body.

Erik pushed me onto my stomach, stretching out over me. Three more powerful shoves of his hips and he's grunting against my back in the sexiest way. I felt him swell inside me - pulsing hard and hot - as he comes.

I felt him throb inside me as hot fluid poured from him into me, making my body contract more forcefully around him. He likes that.

My body milked his until neither of us has anything left to give. The sensation, his sounds, made me want to start all over again.

We're still for several moments, all panting breaths and pounding hearts. Even before his weight rolls from my back, I'm sinking - effortlessly sliding into that mindless exhaustion that comes after blissful exertion.

I could get used to waking up like this.

He kissed all over my back and my bruises gently.

"Want breakfast, little one?"

I made some muffled incoherent sounds as _'mhmm'_ with a huge smile on my face that reflects the brightness I feel in my soul. I felt Erik smiling against my skin too.

"I'll call you when it's done." He kissed my head and let me stretch out like a cat in his bed.

I heard him taking a shower, tempting me to join him, all of Erik was inside of me and all of me was all over me,but I was too exhausted so I rolled over in the sheets for a while, and drifted off for few more minutes.

When I opened my eyes, I was alone in bed. I remember Erik mentioning he was going to make breakfast, I just hope I didn't oversleep and missed him. Please don't let him be gone to work.

I went downstairs and heard movement in the kitchen. Thank god. I smiled to myself and headed to my room to take a shower and change my clothes.

I stepped into the shower quickly, making super-fast work of washing my hair, soaping everywhere and shaving… everywhere.

My skin is all smooth and bruised, just like Erik likes it. It turns me on too.

I headed downstairs again.

I heard Erik talking and I didn't know if it was a private conversation so I lurked in the hallway again. I saw him in the living room, with the laptop on the table before him. He was Skyping. Suddenly I heard Pietro's sweet voice and I smiled.

"I miss you too, buddy." Aww, can you hear my heart melting. Erik being a dad just makes me so happy, all giddy and gushy inside.

"And I miss Charles, Dada."  
  
"You do?"

"Yes. Can he come with me next time?"

"Come where?"

"To mommy's house."  
  
"I don't think she'll like that. Doesn't Nana take care of you well?"

"Well yeah but… I want Charles. He plays with me all the time."

I heard Erik chuckle and I was almost in tears.

"Can he stay with us forever?" Scratch 'almost'.

I saw Erik's expression change as he stared into the laptop. He still looked happy and relaxed that he was talking to his son, but there was sadness in his voice.

"I'd really like that too, buddy."

"Good. Maybe we can ask him."

"You really like him, don't you?"

"Yes. I like Charles. He smells really nice." Erik laughed.

"I agree."

"And he has a nice laugh."  
  
"Yes, he does."

My heart swelled so much it was about to burst.

"And some nights I feel him in my sleep, coming to my room and pulling the blanket up to make sure I'm covered, he kisses my head and leaves. And he makes you smile…"

"Pietro-"

"He makes you smile a lot and I really like that. Do you think he's pretty?"

Erik laughed softly again, but there were tears in his tone.

"I think he is very pretty." I put my hand over my mouth so as not to make any sound of crying from happiness.

"Me too. So we should ask him to stay."

"I'll see what I can do, buddy. Just don't tell your mom what we talked about, okay?"

And just like that my heart broke. Did he want to get back with her? Of course he would. It makes sense. He said he hated that he did this to Pietro, he wants them to be family again. Does he still love her? Goddamn it, how could I be so stupid. I was already imagining us sailing off into the sunset. The three of us. I imagined a family with a man I couldn't have any future with outside of fucking.

"Why? Wouldn't she want us to be happy?"

"I- I don't know buddy. That's why we should keep it to ourselves for now."

"Okay. I love you, daddy."

"Love you too."

The call ended and I saw Erik running his hands through his hair and over his face, leaning backwards exhaustedly against the sofa.

I finally made my entrance and he smiled immediately. It was light but it made my heart sing.

"Charles…"

Once I reached him, instead of sitting next to him, [I knelt between his legs](http://tedystaleva.tumblr.com/post/119440656427/chapter-11) and rested my head on his thighs. His hand went in my hair, softly massaging my scalp. I closed my eyes and I felt safer than ever.

"What are you doing, Charles?"

"You said this is where I should always be. At your feet," I mumbled, brushing my head against his leg like a cat.

"You're very eager to please me and that makes me nothing but happy, but… I can't ask you to submit to me 24 hours, little one."

I didn't even look up to meet his gaze before I was speaking the truth again, "I don't want to be anywhere else but here."

"Charles…" he gasped and I opened my eyes to see the very visible bulge in his pants. I ran my hand shyly along his thighs until I reached my destination.

"Charles… We need to- talk-" his breath hitched. I felt some tension in him beside the obvious arousal. This is my time - I want to make him feel good. Whatever is troubling him, I want to be the cure for it.

Erik's eyes returned to mine and he straightened. I don’t know what his expression means - something fierce, something not quite in control - but I’m not afraid of it. I’m not afraid of him, even in this state.

I just want him to share it with me.

"I love how hard you are," I breathed against him, already shoving my hand in his pants, making him twitch.

"Charles…" he tried to grab my hand, not quite wanting me to stop but it's a gesture for me to stop anyway. I can see ire in every taut line of his body. For whatever reason, be it frustration or something deeper, he's fighting for control.

Insecurity rose to the surface first. All the old feelings - feelings that I’m not enough, feelings that I’m not normal, that I’ll never be normal - battled to drag me down into a feeling of hopelessness and depression. But something stronger rises. It rises fast and high, to overwhelm and eclipse. It’s the desire to make Erik happy, to soothe his anger, to ease his frustration in any way that I can.

I leaned down and kissed his cock. "Fuck, Charles, wait." He reached for me and pulled me into his lap just like the first time we had sex here. I started to panic. He looked tormented, I didn't know what to do.

"What is it, Erik?" I asked softly, reaching to brush my fingers over his face.

"I- I'm scared." He closed his eyes, and I still couldn't believe a man like him could be scared of something. And, just like that, he's human. And vulnerable. And slightly imperfect. And even more dangerous to me than he was before. Because now I have feelings for him and he has the greatest power to hurt me, which I feel he's going to do any moment now. I was tracing my fingers over his lips and chin, before I asked unsurely,

"Are you… scared of your wife?"

His eyes shot open and he grabbed my hand roughly, startling me. He pressed my fingers right on his scar above his lips.

"Not _scared. Scarred_ by her."

  
***

  
I was still in his lap when he started telling me his story.

"Magda and I met years ago. She's the daughter of one of my associates at work. Her father is a very wealthy and powerful man. She kept coming to my office wanting to spend time with me. I knew she liked me, and her father was very important to me so I didn't do anything to drive her away. At the time I didn't do relationships much. I just had my fun with others like me. But… one night I slept with her. I knew she wasn't into that stuff, but vanilla sex is sometimes refreshing, like a nice vacation - lazy, easy, self-indulgent. So I did it with her for a while. Later on I explained to her it was a mistake, I told her everything I enjoyed and that things wouldn't work between us. She didn't seem to be very upset about the way things ended. Until two months later when she stepped into my office, saying she was pregnant. I didn't know what to do. I was angry at her, the moment I looked into her eyes I knew why she took it so well, she planned this, she tricked me into this so she could keep me. And she kept me. Because only cowards run away. Men step up. I took responsibility - I went to every doctor's appointment, provided all the stuff for the baby before he was even born. I thought 'I can do this. I will take care of my child even if I'm not beside him'. So the time went by, I can't even say I was on friendly terms with her. And when the day came… I wasn't prepared. I didn't know it would feel like this. A tiny nose, two perfect lips, long lashes, a wisp of blond hair, and hands that I could already tell were miniature versions of my own. In an instant, my world shifted and I was at his mercy. It all disappeared, all my anger towards Magda and everything just vanished like with a magic wand. It didn't matter anymore. From that moment on, there was nothing I wouldn't do for this beautiful little creature.

I had to provide him the family he deserved. I asked her to marry me. She got me right where she wanted me, but I wasn't angry anymore, I was just happy to have a son. And I promised myself I would end all those games, to try and have a normal family. Three years passed and Magda wasn't anything to me but a roommate and of course the mother of my child, but that didn't change my feelings for her. I wasn't taking any pleasure in anything I was doing with her. So I started visiting the club again. The club we went to that night - I owned it. And I kept visiting it for the next year, a few nights a week. I was a good father and I got what I needed at the same time. Until one night she followed me. She found out I've been doing it again, and went hysterical. We went home and she started throwing stuff at me, she hit me with a vase, that's where I got those scars from. For the first time I was the one to take the beating. She said she will never let me see Pietro again. She kicked me out of the house - the house I'd paid for - filed for divorce, and sought full custody of Pietro. The judge allowed information about the club and other stuff she dug up somehow into evidence. I lost custody. My lawyer and I fought for at least visitation. But her lawyer argued I was a sex addict who had abusive, violent, anti-women proclivities. My own mother stood up at her side too, can you believe it? Every single thing that had been happening in the club killed my defense. No one even cared if I'd done that stuff. Guilt by association. Apparently you can't be a father if you're considered 'kinky'. I swore to protect him and I fucked it up."

"How? By being kinky?" I asked in a small voice, still not believing everything I just heard.

"By letting my son down. I should have put his needs over my own."

"No. That's not how it works. Your sexuality is none of your kid's business. It's not your parents' business. It's not the court's business. I would have killed to have had a father like you, someone who would protect me and defend me and respect me and my mom. You're kinky, you showed me there's nothing to be ashamed about. You can still be an amazing dad. Saying you can't be a good father because of your sexuality is like saying gay men or lesbians can't be good parents. That's absurd."

"Absurd or not, that's how the courts ruled. I bought this place and I stayed in it like an outcast. A whole year I spent here without any sort of… contact with another human being. My son suffered because of me, I suffered without him. Thank god she came to her senses to see that it's not good for our child and she finally agreed on joint custody. It took her a whole fucking year…"

"Oh you poor man…" I mumbled through the coming tears.

"And now I'm afraid again."

"Why?"

"Because you exist."

"Me..."

"I could not be more grateful that you exist. You're the epitome of innocence, seducer, and feisty. You're sweet. Shy, yet sexy. I fell for you the moment I saw you. But… In a child custody case everything is evidence, including the father's new girlfriend/boyfriend… and the activities we do for which he was taken from me in the first place." I looked into his eyes, he's brushing gently my hair, but he's more than angry. He's furious.

"It's not fair," I whined, already crying, like a little child. He just told me he wanted us to be together, as a couple, it wasn't about sex to him either. How am I supposed to accept that we both want to be together but we can't?

"What is fair is rarely a question the courts bother answering. What is right is often thrown under the bus in favor of what _looks_ right." I continued crying, burying my head in his chest as he tucked me closer, whispering,

"I want you, Chares, by my side, at my table, in my bed, as a very big part of my life, as part of my family too…" A burst of heat shot through me so intense it made me ache. "AndI want to give you all, Charles. All the fucking things you deserve. I just introduced you to the world you belong and I want to show you more of it… but I can't. If you want to experience everything you'll have to find someone else."

"No…"

"I want to take you to the club, collar you and show everyone that you're mine. God, they'd be so jealous… you deserve someone to own you, show up proudly with you by his side. I want to be that person, but I can't. I want to keep my son and for that I had to say goodbye to this world, to my friends, and now the hardest one… to you."

I fell silent, unable to move. This couldn't happen to me.

"I have dreamed for a year about getting my son back, and I cherished every single moment he's been by my side for the last months. I have dreamed for sixteen years about finding the perfect partner for me. I found the perfect partner for me but to keep my son with me, I have to give up the perfect one for me. How fucking unfair is that?" he spat out angrily.

I'm devastated to hear his tragedy. I feel for him and at the same time I'm selfish enough to still want him. I want us to be together. I'm just as angry as he is. And helpless.

"But I'm yours."

"You are and you will always be, but I can't do this to you… I can't keep you a secret."

"Erik, please. I'm yours. No one will have to know. I want to be with you no matter how."

"Charles… If we do this… it has to stay only between these walls. And we have to be careful. The more time we spend together the more likely it is someone will find out, the more likely she will find out. There's no privacy in this world anymore. The Internet has killed that fantasy. All it takes is one person knowing or one picture or one rumor spreading… my ex-wife can hire a private detective and get all the evidence she needs in an hour to keep me away from Pietro. She's capable of doing that, I know her that well."

"I'm sure of what I want. And that is you. I can be your secret."

I'm not sure if my vision was blurring because I wanted so desperately to be his, that tears spilled from my eyes, or I was really seeing tears in his.

He was silent for a while, just looking at me, stroking my cheek. He made a rumbling sound in frustration right before he took my lips in a searing kiss. It's rough and it's brutal and it's raw. And it's everything I want from him because it's honest. And he's sharing it with me. _With me._

"I'm sorry it has to be this way, but I promise you I'll do everything for you."

"Oh god…" I gasped and kissed him again. We are doing this. I reached up with one hand and threaded my fingers into his hair, grinding our lips together. His tongue tangled with mine and then I felt his teeth sink into my bottom lip before he pulled away. I tasted blood, but I didn't care. I saw his eyes fall to my mouth. I know he sees what he did to me. I know he likes it. And I'm desperate for him to like it as much as I do.

I don't want him to stop. He needs this. And I want to give it to him.

I dragged my tongue along my lip, licking up the blood. His eyes flit up to mine and I see the last little bit of his grip loosen.

"I want those lips right where they belong and doing what they started earlier."

I slid down before him, gasping with excitement and arousal. There's a naughty joy - a dirty fucking thrill - from being on my knees in front of him, when he yanks at my hair, when he utters the filthiest words. Because he knows exactly what he's doing - knows what I need. I give him my body, my supplication, and he gives me breath-stealing pleasure in return.

But I'm not powerless, even on my knees. I give, he takes - but he needs me to give. He's desperate for me to give - it's there in the pleading of his eyes, the assertive push of his hand, and the whispered command to fucking hurry. We're the perfect balance of passion - a heady, equalized mix of desire and fulfillment.

I peeled his pants off and pushed them to the side. Erik's cock juts up, thick and ready, exacting all of my attention, waiting to be handled. His dick is a sight to behold - impressive girth, masculine veins, potent length - it deserves to be emulated, sculpted, and revered like a precious piece of art.

I took him in my hand, gripping firmly, stroking slowly from base to tip.

"Fuck," he moaned.

I licked him, up and down, slathering moist desire along the length. My name was groaning from his lips.

"Charles…"

Liquid heat suffuses my body at the sound of his voice, wetness gathered in my pants, spurring me on. Driving me to give him this pleasure, to make him writhe, to swallow his moans - to swallow _him_.

To make him forget why we can't be together - leaving him fixated only on who's about to make him come.

"I love how you taste." I placed my lips around the head, bulbous and hot. I sucked at it, circling my tongue. Then I descend, taking him all the way down, the way he showed me he loves last night. I relaxed my throat, letting him in, breathing through the gag impulse, and swallowed - knowing the reflexive muscles will contract tight around him.

His hips surged up, seeking more depth - more snug, wet heat. Then I slowly withdrew, sucking hard, dragging with my lips and tongue as I go. I lowered down on him again, quickening the pace, adding the tiniest scrape of teeth.

And his hand in my hair gripped tight and painful. I want him to push me, pull me - fucking use me. I want him to give me sex. I want him to push me on the ground and give me his cock. I want him to kiss me, lick me, fuck me, suck me. I want to pretend the obstacles for us not to  be together hadn't happened. I want him to make it go away.

"Oh fuck… deeper… Charles… shit… that's it, little one."

His cock hardened even more, and mine did the same. Because of that slick, silken rod filling my greedy mouth. I wrapped my fingers around him near the base and jerked up and down in harmony with my mouth. Then his hand on my head tugged, holding me steady, as his cock slid in and out of my mouth, with the volition of his thrusting hips.

"Fuck… I'm coming… coming in your perfect mouth… fuck…"

I felt the flesh expand, swell, and a second later hot, salty streams surged on my tongue, filling my mouth. I swallowed every bit he gave me - appreciatively.

Erik gulped for air as he ran his fingers through my hair softly now, soothingly.  
  
When he went slack in my mouth I released him and immediately found myself pulled up, pressed against him. He held me as we tumbled back on the comfortable sofa. He kissed my forehead, my closed eyes. And I smiled pleased, almost as much as him.

"I will make you a promise I intend to keep, but you have to promise me something else," he said, breathless.

"Anything."

"I'll give you anything you want. As often as you want it. Ugly, rough, the dirtiest things you can think of. I’d do it all for you, Charles. I’d come all over you and then lick it off. On that sexy mouth, on your chest. In that beautiful ass. So far up inside you, it wouldn’t come out for days."

"Oh god, Erik." I arched my back, moaning. He captured my mouth and ravaged it, the kiss demanding and rough, relentless and overpowering, reminding me who was in control.

"Behave."

"Sir…"

"Mmm, the things I'd do to you. The places I'd put my tongue and fingers, the way I’d slide them in and out. Fast and hard, then slow and easy." The movement of his body above mine was steadily increasing.

"The things I'd taste with my tongue. Damn, I can't wait to slip my tongue inside you."  
  
"Jesus-"

"I love your tight little body wrapped around my cock. Hot. Slick. I'll have you anytime I can. You deserve to be adored, and you deserve to be fucked until you can't stand up. And I promise you both. I promise you _everything_ , Charles. I need you to promise me _forever_."

I lay there beneath him, our breaths mingling, overwhelming me along with his words that went straight to my heart. I answered without hesitation.

"I promise you forever."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now you know. Sorry for the lateness of this but I've been pretty busy and I'm afraid that's how it's going to be from now on.  
> But I promise we'll soon meet Magda, Erik's friends, Charles going back home for some time and kinky sex xD


End file.
